Bleeding Soul
by Kaede C
Summary: Immortality, a gift and a curse. Amara, a new player in town knows the bane of being Immortal...and it get's even worse when Wolfram and Hart are after her. [New Chapter Up]
1. Traveling

Bleeding Soul  
  
Written By: Kaede C.  
  
Disclaimer: Joss owns all things Angel and BtVS. I only own Amara and Sairi as well as the plot. Wee.  
  
Rating: PG-13 [Violence and Language]  
  
Time-Line: Directly after season one and into season two.  
  
Pairings: None   
  
Summery: Wolfram and Hart is looking to become immortal, lucky for them an immortal just came to LA ...but, alas Angel got to the immortal first.   
  
Authors Note: I hope you like this story, for me it's a big deal. This is where I plan on going for a stress reliever. When I mentioned Immortal in the Summery, I don't mean Highlander immortal...I am well aware some of you will probably assume that this story is a highlander cross-over. It's not, it's pure Angel fan-fiction. There are two original characters, and yes they are the main basis of this story. Hopefully you will like how they blend in with the Angel World. Also this story blends first person with third person, just to let you know. So please read and review, if you want to see images of the original characters or learn more about the story go to this website:  
  
www.freewebs.com/bleeding_soul  
  
First Person Speaking  
  
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-  
  
Prologue: Traveling  
  
Once upon a time there was a teenager living the perfect life, and it was perfect....at least among her standards. She had a loving family, a stay at home mother who would bend over backwards to make sure the teenager had a happy childhood. Her father, a successful lawyer who when ever he was able to come home from the firm would make sure his time with his family was perfect. Then she had a sister, a mirror image of her...she had a twin. They were among the popular of the highschool crowed, they were athletic and beautiful...until one day this world shattered. My world...I'm Amara, and this...well this is my story.   
  
        "We're moving to LA?!" squealed the two teenagers sitting next to each other at the dinning room table. Mouths hung open, expressions on the two girls faces were priceless. It was a little after dinner, the dishes on the table had been cleaned off by a woman in her late thirties a kind smile on her face as she sat down next to her husband who was still in his work cloths, a perfect tailored suit. A smile was on his face as well, it seemed things were going perfect for him. He had the greatest life, a loving wife, and two children he adored as well as a career that was getting better and better.   
  
        "I was just hired by a law firm over there, more pay, a better house, and a better school." The kids seemed happy, that was the one thing he had been worried about when he had heard the news of the long move to L.A...would his family like the move? His wife had been happy about it, though she was happy about anything, and that's what he loved about her. Thank-fully, the kids liked the idea; both of them getting up and leaving the room slack jawed talking to one another about all the cool things they could do in L.A.   
  
        "I think you made them happy dear..." His wife spoke as she got up from the table, planning on doing the dinner dishes. He smiled and got up as well, pulling her into a hug which quickly moved into a slow dance, without the music.   
  
        "Did I make you happy though?"  
  
        "Of course you did Jake, it's a big deal. You've won every case in your career so far, you deserve this." She said with a smile as she rested her head on his shoulder.  
  
        "Yeah...I guess I do." His lips curved upwards into a smile, he did win every case...he was ruthless when it came to that, he really didn't care if those he represented were guilty or not...it was his job to get them off...and that's what he did. That's probably why Wolfram and Hart had hired him, he was the best at what he did in Cleveland, and now he was ready to play with the big boys.  
  
        Then his world came crashing down around him, his wife had coughed...and gave a sound of shock...looking down they both seen the skewer that was poking through her stomach. Blood was pouring from her mouth as she looked at him in shock saying something to him before she fell to the floor, but it was too muffled for him to make it out.   
  
        What had killed her, what had been hiding behind her was the most horrifying thing Jake had ever seen. He wasn't even able to scream before his neck was sliced threw like butter. His body landing next to his wife, both lifeless corpses laying in a pool of blood. The demon smiled and looked up at the ceiling...his next targets were upstairs.  
  
*-.-.-.-.-*  
  
        If I had known that would have been the last day of my life I would have, well done something important...but, what? What could I have done? I was just a teenager, a shallow teenager at that. Who thought life revolved around if I was going to be going to prom with the hottest guy in the school. If I had known then what I know now...maybe I wouldn't have died in the first place. However, life really doesn't give you the second chance to relive key moments in your life...I guess I'm stuck, but I except that...  
  
        "Amanda, do you think dad will spring on a shopping trip once we get to LA? I mean we do need new clothes if we are starting a new school right?" Amara asked with a devious smile as she flopped onto her bed, laying on her stomach as pale slender hands thumbed the pages of a recent Seventeen magazine.   
  
        Amanda shrugged as she pulled her long reddish blonde hair back into a pony tail before yawning and plopping down in her bed which was opposite of Amara's. "I don't really care...I mean, we're goin' to L.A. I'll be happy with rags as long as I'm there."  
  
        "You will not be happy with rags and you know it." The magazine was tossed off the bed as the seventeen year old flipped back on her bed eyes open looking up at the ceiling.   
  
        Minutes later the room was silent and dark, filled with just the sounds of the twins breath being taken in and out, the door creaked open and light poured into the large room. It was the room of every teenage girl, or at least every teenage girl like them, posters of famous boy bands and rappers adorned the walls, clothes were everywhere along with make-up and hair ties. Something looking like a rather large dog crept into the room, leaving bloody prints on the green carpet.   
  
        The skewer ejected from it's hand, bright silver eyes reflected the light that shone into the room as the creature crawled under Amanda's bed. She turned onto her side as it crept under, a muffled noise from her mouth was given as she fell back into a nice calm sleep. The skewer was pushed through the bed, and into Amanda's body. She uttered not a sound, as her eyes popped open and blood poured out of her body, dripping off the bed and onto the floor. It was a whisper, it couldn't really be heard as the creature crawled out from under the bed.  
  
        "Am...ara." Was the last word Amanda had said.   
  
        She bolted upright, inhaling breath so fast as if she had just been smothered with a pillow and she was trying to take in as much air as she could. Blue eyes looked around the room...something wasn't right. She felt it in the pit of her stomach, throwing the covers of her bed onto the floor and over the creature who had frozen with hope it wouldn't be seen, she jumped up off the bed and ran to the light switch.   
  
        A scream echoed through-out the quiet night, a neighbor had been awoken and called the police in concern. It wouldn't be enough to save her though, the young woman was the only one left of her family. Eyes were wide as she looked at the blood covered bed her sister was on, Amanda's eyes were still open holding that same expression of fear that Amara's now held.   
  
        "DAD!" She screamed as she ran down the stairs, knowing that neither parent would be asleep yet...they normally were watching the news in the den. They weren't there. Her heart was beating so fast she thought it would explode out of her chest as she ran to the kitchen. The light was still on, the table still in the same manor it was when they left...why didn't her mom clean it up yet? She moved so slow, afraid to see what she already knew. They were dead...all of them. Her thoughts were confirmed when she seen the head of her father at her feet. Another scream was let out as she ran for towards the front door of the house, bare feet skidding in her parents blood she tripped and slammed her head hard on the door frame.  
  
        Vision doubled for a moment, her breath caught in her chest as she tasted the salty tears that she didn't even know were falling from her eyes. The creature stood in front of her, skewer in its claw like hand. She struggled to get up, but her feet just slipped on the blood covered floor. She could barely hear the sirens in the background. She shut her eyes, the creature moved forward with a ferocious growl as the skewer was dragged across her neck, blood pooling out slowly she found it hard to breath...and then there was nothing...  
  
I had died... My family was gone, and so was I. As far as I know I was dead for three months. I don't know what happened during those three months, I don't remember if I was in heaven or hell or somewhere else. The last thing I remember is dying. My family was killed because of me...because of some damned prophecy that determined that I was going to be a demon slayer when I got older...and a good one at that. So the demons killed me. That should have been that. I shouldn't have been brought back. I as I'm told however has a destiny I need to fulfill before my deadly slumber. I have to do what I was meant to do. Damn-it...it's not fair!!! Why me? Why my family? Why?  
  
        It had been raining for most of the afternoon, it always seemed to rain at funerals. This was a funeral that many had attended, four people. A mother, a father and twins had been killed in their home. Case still open, and killer not found yet. Four bodies were put into the earth next to one another, to be together...forever.  
  
        The funeral was over but two men were still there, standing under umbrellas. Both clad in the best suits money could buy.   
  
        "I'm surprised that they sent someone to come here..." The larger of the two men said, looking back towards the recently placed headstones. "I do have to say you guys did miss out on the best lawyer around."   
  
        The shorter man nodded, "Wolfram and Hart didn't send me, I came on my own accord." As he spoke the words, his head was turned in the direction of the grave site, he had known all of them..."Though they were going to send someone, I just thought it best that I go in place of anyone. After all, I did know them." [AN: I know Lindsey is actually from Oklahoma, but for the sake of this Fic, he's from Cleveland.]  
  
        "Oh...really?"  
  
        "Yes, Jake was...well, a good friend of mine. He taught me everything I know..."  
  
          
  
        "Hmm, that's good to know Mr...?"   
  
        "McDonald...Lindsey McDonald."   
  
        "Ah, yes...Well, I have to be off...the court system unfortunately doesn't wait even for things like this." The man turned and started walking away towards his car.  
  
        "Don't I know it..." Lindsey mumbled under his breath with a sigh, as he started towards his car as well though stopped once his cell phone chirped. "Hello? Oh...yes, it doesn't look like a human did it. I found out from the local investigators that there had been footprints that looked like 'extremely large dog prints to them. No sir, the family didn't have a dog...yes I'm sure. We have a team looking into it. No, I'm planning on staying around here for awhile. Yes sir...I'll be in next week."  
  
The phone was turned off and placed into his jacket before he set off for the car that was waiting for him. He took one look back at the graves. His head gave a slight shake, "Lawyers shouldn't have to die...they should really be immortal in this line of work..." He spoke under his breath as he walked out, with a sigh.  
  
Sometimes I wonder why people wish to be immortal... I think it has to do with fear of death, I know I was terrified of death. It can't be that bad...after all everyone does it. Hmm, bad joke. I'm not really good at those now-a days. Immortality isn't all it's cracked up to be...  
  
Three Months Later:  
  
        The pale moonlight shone down upon the cemetery, shadows being cast from it's light. It was spooky, like something out of a horror movie. Everything was silent, except for the occasional breeze of air which entwined in the leaves of the trees causing them to rattle and a few of the leaves to fall. A lone figure was walking along the paths of the cemetery, looking at the passing headstones. It was obviously there for some reason, it's ear twitched as it stopped in front of a headstone.  
  
AMARA EMILY THOMPSON  
  
        1980-1997  
  
Playing Piano in Heaven Now.  
  
        It stepped towards the headstone, stopping right in front of it. Coal black eyes looking around in the night making sure no one was around before it pawed at the headstone. "Wake up already will ya...I got thing's ta do...places ta be..." it's voice was lighter then the average grown mans...though that might be because it wasn't a man at all. It was a dark orange colored fox, who currently looked very odd sitting on the headstone looking down in boredom...waiting.  
  
        This fox, hadn't always been able to talk...nor had it been intelligent in any sort. It had been... a regular fox, in the woods doing what normal foxes did rather then waiting at a headstone for a girl to crawl out of her grave. Now, however he had been 'taken over' so to speak. The Powers That Be used the animal now to be a guide for the person he was waiting for. He was, what a fox would be if it had human intelligence...he was Sairi.  
  
        A yawn was given, his muzzle opening wide for a moment...boredom had set in an hour ago...How hard was it to dig yourself out of a grave? He rolled his eyes and shook his head before falling asleep on the headstone.  
  
        Sairi was awoken by a small noise, dirt covered fingertips were poking out of the green grass. He jumped off the headstone and begun to dig around the hand which was caked with blood, though no cuts were there...apparently she cut herself in digging threw the coffin, and already healed herself...well the powers healed her...but who cared. Right now all he wanted to do was to get her out and have her take him to get food. That was the first thing on his mind. After all, he was still a fox.  
  
        It took another half an hour for the girl to get out of the grave, her burial clothes caked in dirt, her long tresses tangled around her face. As she breathed in fresh air, laying on her back with Sairi looking her over. His head tilted in confusion, she wasn't much....it looked like she weighed nearly nothing...why would they bring someone like her back? She didn't seem the type, but that wasn't his choice...he didn't get to choose who came back and who didn't. He was just a guide.   
  
        Her eyes slowly opened as she sat up, looking around in fear. Sairi nudged her hand slightly to let her know he was there and she nearly jumped out of her skin. "Don't worry, yer safe." His accent was clearly none anyone could recognize, though that was probably due to the fact that he learned to speak watching the television...  
  
        She had curled up in a ball, next to her grave stone and lightly whimpered at the confusion...a talking fox...a cemetery...dirt everywhere...the air hurt her lungs, vision was blurry and she...was...alive.  
  
I didn't know what was going on at that moment, and Sairi wasn't really a help. Though, Sairi is never really a big help. In some ways it was comforting however when he told me I was safe. I didn't believe him though. What happened to the monster that was after me? Why wasn't I at home...I wept....so confused...I just wanted to curl up in my parents lap and have them tell me it would be okay. It wouldn't be okay though...they were dead.   
  
Six Years Later  
  
        "Damn it Sairi...why does it have to be there?" Amara asked in a harsh tone, though she didn't mean for it to be directed to the fox that was sitting on the sofa in the small apartment...it had meant to be directed towards the Powers That Be. For six years she had been traveling the world, getting her ass kicked as she followed orders from Sairi who received cryptic messages for her.   
  
        "Well...look at it this way, mebbie you'll meet a movie star" Sairi, the ever jovial fox told her as she sighed and flopped down on the sofa next to him. She shook her head and kicked the wooden table in front of her, causing it to fly across the room and break against the wall. Each year she got stronger, was another year of painful exercises to control the strength she had.  
  
        "I was just getting used to life here...it's nice, quiet..." They had been living in Ireland for some time now, in a small coastal town called, Chifden. A place they had come to in order to destroy a whole population of Zombies. Which hadn't really been that hard, ever since it was quiet. Sairi hadn't received any messages until now, meaning Amara had time to get a job to make some money so they didn't have to live on the streets while they were there or go hungry. Staying there also meant she was able to train for awhile, her skills with the sword had been getting better.  
  
        "Well...you have a"  
  
        "Duty to uphold" She finished for Sairi, after hearing the speech many times before hand.   
  
        Sairi just shook his head and nipped at her hand which had been resting on her denim clad leg, "Hey! Don't do that..."  
  
        "Well then, don't interrupt me when I'm talkin' to ya." He said with that self satisfying voice that said he would be smirking if he could smirk. "We have to leave for LA as soon as possible, the higher ups are making it loud and clear that we need to get there as soon as possible...and by loud and clear I mean my head is splittin'"  
  
L.A. A place where I didn't want to go. Not anymore at least, I don't want to go there. That's where I was supposed to already be if I didn't die. Where I was meant to go...I don't want to go there with out my family...it's just not fair.  
  
        They were at the airport in Dublin, Amara nearly falling asleep. It was nearly three AM in the morning. They were supposed to leave at midnight, meaning she should already be fast asleep on the plane...but unfortunately like always, fate was against Amara and the flight was going to be leaving late. She had already checked her one suitcase, having to have Sairi do a incantation so she wouldn't have problems getting her sword on the plane. One suitcase, that was her life...just clothes...identical clothes at that, jeans, tank tops and leather armor...that's all she wore. There was no sense anymore to be 'trendy'. She had a carry-on black khaki book bag resting on her lap, one item was in it...Sairi, he was put in the book bag when they walked around in public. Due to the fact it wasn't everyday that one would see a domesticated fox that couldn't keep his mouth shut.  
  
        She rubbed her eyes when her flight was called, first she would go to New York City, then from there to L. A. It was a long trip. Slowly standing up she pulled on her denim jacket and then pulled the bag Sairi was in onto her shoulders "Eh, careful honey." She just rolled her eyes hearing him, not bothering to be more careful with the bag he was in. She put her headphones over her ears, and switched the CD player that was in her jacket on as she walked towards her gate.  
  
I don't enjoy flying...I don't enjoy sitting for long periods of time on a death trap. It's not like if it crashes I'll die. It's just if we crash, I'd get to watch everyone else die. That really isn't something that I wish to have happen. So to LA we went, a place where I dreaded to go. It didn't sound appealing anymore. I as it seems didn't have a choice in the matter. All I know is we have to be there...other then that there isn't much else. Damn Powers can kiss my ass with these fucking cryptic messages, why can't they be straight forward?   
  
        After sleeping nearly the whole trip both Amara and Sairi were both slightly Edgar to get a cheep motel room to store their stuff before going around town and looking for demons to kill. After all obviously they were called here to kill demons...why else would they be called there?  
  
        The motel room was seedy, in the worst part of town. Amara was surprised that there weren't any bugs in the room...at least none that she could see. Sairi was complaining about the hardness of the bed as she undressed and showered. After cleaning herself off and drying off she tossed the damp towel atop of Sairi, who was now complaining about the television reception.   
  
        "Stop it. We are not getting a better place rather you like it or not. We have to make the last bit of money we have last. It might be a while before I'm able to find a job. After all not many people hire people who when they look up their social security number are literally dead" She stated as she pulled on a pair of dark jeans, followed by a tank top. Sairi had fallen off the bed as he tried to get out of the damp towel, finally his head poked out.  
  
        "Fine, I'll shut up...but when ya wake up with bugs in yer bed don't ya complain ta me aiight?"   
  
        She just rolled her eyes and looked into the mirror as she combed her hair out. She had cut it a week after she crawled out of her grave, short in the back, long in the front. She didn't know why she cut it...but she just felt like she had to be different then she was before. Why not start with appearance?   
  
        Her pale hands moved to tie a black ribbon around her crudely cut neck...the only thing that really proved to her that she did in fact die that night. Though she did wonder, why that scar remained. Sairi just answered her with 'time will tell' and she just went on with life. Slipping into her boots she scooped up Sairi and stuffed him in the book bag. Pulling the bag on her shoulders she secured her sword to her waist. It was night, hopefully not many people would be around to ask questions.   
  
        Stepping out and locking the motel door she looked around, biting her bottom lip. This place was unfamiliar...she didn't like it. She moved with caution, as she walked through the empty and dark dreary alleyways. "I really don't like this, why did they send us here?"   
  
        "I don't know, they just told me to tell you to come here...that's all." Sairi stated from his resting spot in the book bag. Amara just shook her still damp hair. She wouldn't like it here. That was a definite.  
  
In all my travailing I had grown up...fast. There is nothing left in me from my life before hand, I'm stronger now, I think I might be a better person...not as shallow...and I'm lonely. I was never lonely before, I always had Amanda to keep me company. I often wonder what she would do if she was the one who came back. And then I remember she is me...she would do the same thing as me. Because she is...was...me...and I was her. It was that simple. I wish she was here right now.  
  
*-.-.-.-*  
  
        "What?!" He spoke into the phone that was pressed close to his head. It wasn't possible, the phone call lasted only a mere five minutes. However, it would undoubtedly change his life for good. His only hand he had combed through his hair after he put the phone back down on his desk.   
  
        It was impossible, she was alive...or at least someone that looked almost exactly like her. Wolfram and Hart was the type of law firm that kept close watch on everything in the city of LA, that involved a former employee or one that was still there. This time, it happened to be someone who didn't even get a chance to work at Wolfram and Hart, he was just able to sign the contract before he had been killed, and now apparently his daughter who was supposed to be dead had walked through the LAX airport earlier that morning.   
  
        This, to the senior partners was a big deal...Lindsey shook his head before getting on the phone again. Holland gave him orders, and rather he liked it or not he had to follow them. "Hello? Yes, this is Lindsey from...yeah that Lindsey. I need to get a team to Cleveland Ohio. It's to check and see if someone is still resting peacefully in their grave. Yes...I'll hold."   
  
        It was a big deal, she was dead last he knew and now she was the walking dead...there was only a few things she could really be, a Zombie, Vampire...or...an Immortal. And the first two were out of the question, she was to smart for a zombie, most of which wouldn't know the first thing about getting on or off a plane...and well, she was walking in direct sunlight. If she was an immortal...  
  
        He shook his head and sighed...it had been a long time ago, almost as long as he had been with Wolfram and Hart. If she was an immortal, the law firm would be after her quickly...an immortals blood. That was what the Senior Partners wanted for all the lawyers. If the firm became completely immortal, they would be...powerful.  
  
        And as much as Lindsey wanted to be powerful like that...he didn't want to have anything happen to someone he had used to know, fairly well. If it was her...he prayed Angel would find her first...that was the only way that they wouldn't be able to get their hands on her.  
  
        This, was only the beginning though.  
  
-Bleeding Soul-  
  
Dogstar  
  
I don't wanna be here  
  
but I need to be here  
  
I really wish that I could  
  
I really feel the need to  
  
let my body go  
  
let my feelings show  
  
here comes another worn out  
  
here comes another burned out  
  
here comes another bleeding soul . . .  
  
I don't need to kiss it  
  
I don't need to touch it  
  
I really wish that I could  
  
I really feel the need to  
  
let my body go  
  
let my feelings show  
  
here comes another worn out  
  
here comes another burned out  
  
here comes another bleeding soul . . .  
  
here comes another worn out  
  
here comes another burned out  
  
here comes another bleeding soul . . . 


	2. Harder To Breath

Chapter One: Harder To Breath  
  
LA seemed to be more eventful then I first had assumed. I mean, I know that vampires flock to bigger cities, because of all the happy meals on legs...it's just, all the demons that had been walking the streets at night. I really did think that they would have been more secluded. The night had proven to let me kill three vampires, and one demon who was attacking a woman on the streets. So far I still had no idea as to why I'm here. Sitting on a park bench though, my life changed...  
  
"Why won't you tell me why we're here?" Amara asked Sairi who was currently sitting atop of the book bag resting next to her. In between quick bites of a slice of pizza that was in front of him he spoke,  
  
"Because...ya aren't supposed ta know yet..." She rolled her eyes and dug up the ground with her booted feet, uninterested in the world around her she yawned and tilted her head back.  
  
"I'm going to have to find a job soon..." It practically came out as a moan, even when she was alive she hated looking for a job...which her father had made Amanda and her start doing a few days before they died. "I don't think I'll find one as easy here as I did back in Ireland."  
  
"Well, as long as I have food and a warm place to sleep I'm happy." Sairi responded to her comments with lack of enthusiasm, she just rolled her eyes...foxes had it so easy...they didn't have to work to live...they just...foraged in the forest for food and slept in trees...or...was it holes in the ground? She shook her head, it wasn't a matter to worry about right now.   
  
The park had been empty for the time that Amara and Sairi sat on the bench eating slices of pizza and carrying on meaningless conversation. Until a man, or what looked like a man from far away walked along a path, obviously just taking a short cut threw the park. The clothing he wore was loud, a purple suit with a green fedora...the closer he got to where Amara sat the more she noticed he wasn't a human.  
  
"I think there maybe trouble..." She whispered, causing Sairi to look up from his current resting place on her lap.   
  
"I don't think that evil demons wear nice suits like that...or..." Sairi started as the green man got closer to their position, "Hum, Motown music...but, that's just my opinion."   
  
Amara rose a brow and shook her head, "Not that guy stupid, the rather large demon behind him..." She said it just loud enough for the flamboyantly dressed demon to look slightly shocked before he looked back...the same time Sairi looked behind the man as well.   
  
"That's not good..." Both fox and demon said at the same time, both looking towards each other, the demon in surprise of a talking fox that currently jumped off of her, and the fox because the demon had heard Amara who was currently pulling her sword out of her holster on her belt.  
  
Fighting is one of those things that you can't simply learn how to do in a gym. It would be nice if that was how it works...but unfortunately that's not how it goes. In order to learn how to fight good, to fight for your life that is...you'd have to fight in real life...under real conditions. Which is the only way I have been training since I was brought back. My first experience, Sairi brought me to a cemetery and told me to kill a vampire. Sounds easy huh? But not for someone like me, I didn't have experience...in those first years I had been a walking pin cushion for a while....  
  
Both Sairi and the mystery demon stood back, as far away from the fight as they could get without actually running away which, both had thought of doing. The fight was just Amara and the huge-esque brown demon who had an ax. Which for Amara was a decent change, the demons in Ireland normally traveled in packs, causing for pain and a long...drawn out fight.  
  
Neither Amara or the demon spoke during the fight, no witty comments were thrown back and forth just the sound of weapons crashing together. Apparently both fighters just wanted the event to be over. Amara never fought good, because she didn't have anything to loose...with that in mind she was a sloppy fighter. A few times the Ax had cut her stomach open,   
  
Outstretched arms, holding the sword like a baseball bat she struck the demon in the side, who promptly brought his Ax to her head. The blade resting against her neck, the demon forced her all the way to the ground, she really didn't want to get her head cut off...again. It wasn't a fun experience, she couldn't get a good cut in with her sword either so she let him hold her there, the blade slowly cutting into her neck.  
  
"This doesn't look good for her..." The green man said to Sairi who was perched on the mans shoulder, watching the fight as it took place.  
  
"Don't worry about it...Amara, well...she can handle herself."  
  
Blood from her many wounds she had sustained covered her body, and bottom of her face from when she had coughed the crimson sour tasting liquid up. The demon pressed the weapon harder against her neck, and then she seen an opening. Her worn booted feet connected with the demons torso, kicking as hard as she could the demon fell back and it's ax fell away from its reach. Slowly with a groan she pulled herself up, sword in hand held like a golf club now she swung and the demon was cut in half...green blood spraying the grass and sidewalk around them.   
  
A sigh was given from Amara as she shut her eyes, swayed for a moment and fell back on her back. Breathing in and out was slightly painful, and not something that she enjoyed at the moment. Another teaspoon of blood was coughed up most of it splattering on her face, running down her jaw, down her neck and into her hair... a feeling that made her want a shower now.   
  
When she opened her eyes two things were in her vision, Sairi and the green demon. It was the green one that spoke first. "You're an immortal..." This caused Amara to sigh, well as best as she could considering her lung tissue was being healed at this very moment. It was probably the extremely rapid healing and the fact that she was still alive that gave it away.   
  
"So it seems..." She replied slowly getting up and swaying like a drunk as she did so...  
  
I hate getting hurt like that, it's painful when I get cut up and then even more painful when they heal me. Sometimes I get hurt so bad, I have phantom pains for days after. Some days, some very bad days I think I can feel every single wound I ever got. I figure these are the days the PTB aren't paying much attention to me, these days are the days I stay in bed sweating and coughing up blood. Those are the days that my soul aches for death...   
  
"Hey there Kitten, easy moving. Thanks for just saving my life and all, I think you should rest...you don't look to good." The green mans voice was the kind of voice that just made you want to smile, and she almost did...but Amara wasn't the type to smile, not anymore anyway.   
  
"You're welcome." She stated, removing a glove from one of her hands and wiping the blood away from her mouth, "It's my job..."  
  
"Hmm, how about I take you back to my place and get you cleaned up...I don't think you should go around looking like this..."  
  
Amara blinked and looked down towards Sairi who had yet to say anything on either the matter of her slaying the demon or of this new matter. She gave a shrug and then nodded, Sairi moved back towards the bench and fetched the book bag for her.  
  
"I'm The Host, but most people just call me Lorne sweet-ums...quite the fox you got there."   
  
She blinked and just looked down as she watched Sairi crawl into the bag of his own accord. Something was wrong with him, he wasn't himself...though he was a fox, and she knew sometimes he liked to be left alone. She just shrugged and painfully bent down to pick up the bag. "Yeah, that's Sairi...he's unusual. I'm Amara..."   
  
By the time they had gotten to Lornes place she had finished coughing up the rest of the blood that had been clogging her lungs. Breathing was easier, but it looked like she had just killed a few people by the amount of blood that covered her. She tilted her head as he pulled out a pair of keys.  
  
"You live at a..." She leaned over to read a sign by the side of the door, "Karaoke bar?"   
  
"Caritas...it's a demon Karaoke bar, it's what I do...I read someone's destiny when they sing."  
  
"Demon Karaoke? What an oxymoron..."  
  
"Well, Kitten, this place is protected against violence...no one can hurt someone else...something good when you have a slime demon and a Etherous demon in the same place for example..." He said as he lead her into the bar that not only served as his work place, but as his home as well. She followed and adjusted the bag on her shoulders, phantom pains right now weren't something she wanted...nope...not one bit. Right now all she wanted...needed is more like it, would be a hot shower.   
  
The clock on the wall behind a bar top told Amara that it was almost five AM...they had been out for a while...Time sure did seem to fly when you were beheading and slicing up demons. She rolled her eyes at her own corny joke in her head as she followed the flamboyant perky man to the back room, leading her into a greatly decorated bedroom. This was a first to her, at least the first demon she knew that didn't live in the sewers or a warehouse...this was actually a nice place...it shocked her more then the fact that a demon karaoke bar existed.  
  
He noticed her discomfort with the bag that Sairi was in and took it from her, carefully setting the bag on the large bed and letting Sairi out of it. "Thanks." She said as he went about taking out a large fluffy looking white towel from one of the dresser drawers.   
  
"It's the least I could do...you saved my life Sweet-ums...the shower is behind that door. I'll find something for you to change into while you're in there..." He pointed towards the only door in the room that didn't look like a closet sliding door. She took the towel and gladly made her way to the bathroom. The door shutting and locking behind her she could hear the voices of Sairi and Lorne in the other room.  
  
They had been talking about me...I know that for a fact, Sairi wasn't acting like himself and even Lorne seemed concerned for me and he only just met me. In someways it was nice, having someone take care of me like this...but in another way it made me more depressed for my former life. It seems the more time that went on the more depressed I got...   
  
She stripped from her clothes, that wanted to stick to her body from the blood. She took great care not to let the blood spread to the bathroom that was as clean and as nicely decorated as the bedroom. It wasn't that big, bright blue in color with a theme of sea creatures as decoration. She placed the dirty clothes on the sink, her boots resting next to the door, slowly she took a few breaths of calming air as she turned on the water to a temperature that felt nearly boiling. Just the way she liked it. The sound of the shower muffled the sounds of the two talking in the other room, she nodded and stepped into the shower.   
  
An amused look covered her tired features as she looked around the shower...hair conditioners, and the normal type of hygiene products for the average twenty something man who cared way to much about his appearance. She shook her head, some demons were more normal then some humans. She stood under the hot shower and shut her eyes.   
  
The pain in her temple was growing, a headache from the days activity. Opening her blue eyes, she watched the blood run off her body. There were no wounds, no scars, not even any cuts where she had been hurt today...just bruises that were currently fading. It was definitely easy to tell that the powers were busy tonight...what the hell were they doing? She shook her head and reached for the shampoo as she began her normal ritual of cleaning herself.  
  
In the other room Lorne had been going through his closet looking for something small enough for the girl to wear as the fox spoke to him. "Do you know of someplace called Wolfram and Hart?"   
  
Lorne turned, a white tee shirt in hand and a slight aghast expression on his green face. "It's a law firm...not a very good one at that..."  
  
"So they loose their cases most of the time?"  
  
"No...I mean they aren't very good...they are very bad people..." Lorne pulled out a pair of red pajama pants and headed towards the bathroom door. Raising his hand to knock, but paused. "She's humming."  
  
Sairi looked up, watching as Lorne placed the clothes on the floor next to the door. "Yeah, she does that...always the same damn thing too...used ta play the piano...I think its something she used to play..."   
  
Lorne nodded, "It sounds so sad...not to mention the reading I'm getting from her...that's what has you concerned isn't it?"   
  
"I really dun' think the powers should have sent her here...she's basically walking straight into...well...something that shouldn't have to happen..." Sairi explained, while Lorne knocked on the door.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"The clothes are on the floor in front of the door Kitten, I hope they fit okay..." Lorne called out before going back to sit on the bed next to Sairi who was making himself comfortable on the purple pillow at the head of the bed.  
  
"I'm sure things will work out...she seems like a good kid, I'm sure she'll make the correct choices on her path..."   
  
"I don't know, she tends to walk right into trouble."  
  
Amara was taking a great deal of time in keeping clean, maybe it was the fact that there was so much pain. Maybe the powers weren't the ones making her feel like this, they wouldn't do anything this cruel would they?  
  
She turned off the shower and grabbed the towel, wrapping it around her as she walked out in the now steam covered bathroom. Unlocking the door and opening it slightly she gave a nod of her head as she grabbed the clothes "Thank-you." Was quickly said to Lorne before she disappeared back into the bathroom. Looking at the clothes she rose a brow, they were by far to big...but he was a groan man...these were probably the smallest clothes he had...  
  
Sometimes no matter how much pain one is in during life...the people around them make up for it...you could feel like you were on fire but if you had someone around you that made you happy you wouldn't feel the pain as much...that's how I feel when I'm around those that make me forget about everything wrong in my life...who knew I'd find someone I knew from my old life in LA...  
  
Lately, he seemed to be taking care of everything in the special interests department, he lost his hand in making sure he wouldn't screw up and now people seemed to be pushing more work on him because he 'could do it' he would 'make it work' He already had a lot of work with his cases, but now he was taking care of Darla, and not to mention the current line of business,  
  
"It was empty?" His stomach sank to the basement of Wolfram and Hart from where he was sitting...to him, this wasn't good news. This meant that if they found her, she would be turned into the human fountain of blood...making them all immortal...he needed time to think. He'd go home, talk to Darla...not like she did much talking...she just looked confused most of the time lately...or maybe he'd just get drunk. "I've gotta go." He let the phone drop back down on the receiver before getting up and pulling on his matching suit jacket.   
  
He'd go to Caritas, demons and humans were there side by side without a problem, and it was the only place in town to get a decent T&T...  
  
*-.-.-.-.-.-*  
  
"She looks sick..." Lorne explained to Sairi as he turned on the neon open sign outside the door of the bar.   
  
"She always does afta a fight like that..." Sairi jumped up on the bar, paying little to no attention to the man behind the counter who was currently preparing things for the eight o'clock rush.   
  
"Where are you two staying at?" This morning and for most of the day Lorne didn't get a chance to ask many questions, both Sairi and Amara had fallen asleep and soon Lorne had too. All of them in the bed he was used to being in alone, packed together like sardines, only to wake up seeing Amara clutching Sairi as though he were a teddy bear...  
  
"Some seedy motel, she doesn't want to spend a lot of money, or we will be on the streets soon. She needs to find a job, cause ya know...slaying demons...not exactly a paying jig..." He explained watching as a few demons had already started to pour into the building.  
  
"Hmm, a job? I think I can help with that...I need a new bouncer..."  
  
"I'll do it..." Amara proclaimed as she walked out to sit on a bar stool next to Sairi, a yawn escaping her mouth, apparently having no problem sitting there in baggy pajama pants and a white shirt while people and things were coming in.   
  
"Really? Great..." Lorne smiled and picked up a glass that was given to him by the man behind the bar. "I'll fill you in on the details later, right now I have ta mingle...see you two cats later..."  
  
"I'm not a cat..." Sairi stated with a tone that simply said 'how dare you speak to me like that' while Lorne was walking away.  
  
"You act like a cat..." Amara said, resting her head on the bar top, still tired and feeling a headache coming on as a tone death demon took the stage singing a strange nightmare giving rendition of American Pie.   
  
"T&T please..." A voice next to her said to the bartender, Amara glanced up, just wanting to make sure who she was next...it wasn't that she didn't trust Lornes enchanted 'no harm' policy...it's just that...well...she didn't trust it. The moment she seen who was next to her she turned her head, hoping he didn't see her...This quick action causing Sairi to look at her oddly.   
  
It was someone from her old life...what should she do? Did he even know she was dead? Well,...maybe he didn't...maybe if he noticed her he would just assumed she aged really well...  
  
"Hello Mara, long time no see..." The man used a nickname for her and she cringed turning around. Biting her lip, he looked her over with slight shock...yep he knew she was dead...he had to. She sighed, this was going to cause some questions.  
  
"Lindsey...wow...haven't seen you in...."  
  
She was cut off "You're in danger..." This caused her brows to raise as she looked at him in amazement...well, he sure did cut to the chase. "Please...trust me, come with me...I have to take you somewhere safe...where you are protected..."   
  
"I can protect myself...I'm..."  
  
"Immortal...yes, I know...but there are things worse then death..." Amara sighed, now she knew how Sairi felt everytime she cut him off in the middle of a sentence. She looked to the fox who currently was drinking a beer with a straw.   
  
She rolled her eyes when seeing this. "Sairi, tell Lorne that we will be back later sometime...I need to...go out and get some clothes and stuff..." The fox nodded and jumped off the bar top, mumbling about being a servant under his breath as he walked away.  
  
"How do you know?" She asked, turning back towards Lindsey who had been watching Sairi run through the crowed.   
  
"I didn't know that you were here...I just came here to get drunk, drown my sorrows...that sort of thing, didn't really know that you were here until I glanced over towards you..." He explained sipping his drink slowly.  
  
"No, I meant how did you know what I was?" Tilting her head she then added, "But that had been my next question."  
  
"I'm a lawyer, we know everything..."  
  
She nodded and sighed the moment she turned her head when someone actually good started to sing Stand By Me, it was Lorne...she wasn't surprised, and then there was Sairi, who was perched on a stool singing the course of the song...that...was...interesting.  
  
"Why are you here?" Lindsey glanced her over as she spoke, with raised brows at her odd attire.  
  
"Saved The Hosts life last night...got mangled up pretty bad, came back here...end of story."  
  
"You're different."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I mean..." Lindsey started, unaware how to go with what he had to say next. "Not like you were back in Cleveland, you were...a little..."  
  
"Prissy shallow teen queen?" She smirked, and shook her head. "Things change..."  
  
Things change, that's the understatement of the century, in order to live you must accept the fact that your life is ever changing...therefore you have to accept the fact that you are alive...and as you can tell I don't really except either. I don't like change, and I don't like being alive, as simple as that.  
  
In both Sairi and Lindseys eyes on the car trip over to the motel she had been staying at, Amara looked sick. Neither of them said anything though, due to the fact they didn't want to get their heads bit off. Lindsey knew her from the time he had spent learning from her father, and she knew she didn't like to be told she looked sick...but that was because she was shallow then....now, Sairi knows not to tell her she looks sick because she doesn't want to know that the powers aren't keeping up their end of the immortal bargain [which in all reality isn't a bargain] meaning, they weren't healing her properly.  
  
There was little conversation in the car, there had always been little conversation between Lindsey and Amara back home, and Sairi was currently toying with a watch he had on his arm, obviously amused by it's shiny quality. Amara watched her fox for a moment and just shrugged, he must have stolen it from someone at the bar...it's not like she wasn't going to tell a fox to stop stealing...a fox was a fox was a fox...meaning foxes stole...foxes were sneaky...he would be sneaky rather she liked it or not...why voice her opinion.  
  
Stopping outside the motel she jumped out of the car "I'll only be a minute, let me change...I feel weird in this..." She disappeared into the motel door numbered eighty-one  
  
"So ya knew 'er from before huh? That musta been fun..." Sairi, raised conversation as he sat on the book bag that rested in the middle of the trucks one seat.   
  
"Fun...not exactly the word I would use to explain it."  
  
"Then why are you wanting to help her?"  
  
"Because she doesn't deserve what they are planning on doing to her...they are going to..."  
  
"I know...I know, I don't want to relieve that image the powers gave me. No one deserves that kind of thing..." Sairi stated looking up as Amara stepped out of the door, locking it and adjusting the sword that rested on her belt.   
  
Lindsey blinked, seeing what she was wearing made him realize how much she had changed. A leather tank top, Leather pants that at the knees had some kind of knee pad and then the pants changed from leather to khaki from the knee down to her black boots which the khakis were tucked into...after adjusting her sword she pulled on her gloves before she stepped into the truck.   
  
It was the clothes and the hair cut that had made her look different. He had known her to spend an hour doing her hair, or at least from what Jake told her...now her hair was short and to the point...and her clothes...looked like they were made for war. Very different from her straight out of Vogue clothing style.  
  
"What?" She stated seeing his very odd slack jawed expression.  
  
"You really did change."  
  
"Yeah...death will kind of do that to you."  
  
Ten minutes into the trip she glanced over towards the man she used to know, only then he was geeky, and now he was...almost as different as she had became, wearing a wrinkled suit, his hair a mess, his expression that of a worried one that had never changed...and a missing hand.  
  
"What happened to your hand?"  
  
"Got it cut off..."  
  
"By who?"  
  
"The guy that we are going to for your protection." She blinked and made an amused 'hmm' sound while Sairi was just laughing at the irony of what he had said.  
  
"So we are going to the guy that chopped off your hand so he can protect me from the people you work with? Interesting..."  
  
"He's a good guy..."  
  
"So are you..."  
  
"No I'm not."  
  
The conversation was left at that, no more was said as they had headed towards where-ever this hand chopping man lived or worked. Amara really didn't like the idea of someone other then herself protecting her. However, if Lindsey thought she needed it....then maybe it was a good idea. Protection from the place where he worked...now that was irony.   
  
Lindsey wasn't exactly happy about having to take her to Angel...who at the current moment he hated with a fiery passion...but she needed someone who Wolfram and Hart was scared of to protect her. She had changed, as he looked towards her out of the corner of his eye he knew...this wasn't the same person he knew...she wasn't talking about herself, or clothes. If it wasn't the same person he knew then why was he protecting her though? He pulled into the last place Wolfram and Hart seen Angel as he came to the conclusion that he wanted her to be safe because he owed it to Jake, the man who was like a father to him.   
  
"This is the place..." He announced after a moment of sitting silently where he had parked the truck. Sairi jumped up on the dashboard and looked up at the apartment building in front of them.  
  
"At least it's better then the motel." He spoke looking towards Amara, who still looked slightly on the sick side. Her forehead was resting on the window of the door, eyes shut, only opening when Sairi announced his opinions. Her blue eyes glanced over the building and she shrugged,   
  
"I guess." She opened the car door, and Sairi got ready by jumping into the bag. Just as she was about to grab her bag and jump out Lindsey placed his hand on her shoulder, causing her to jump slightly before looking back towards him.  
  
"Are...you okay? You don't look well." He was concerned, his expression showed it while she bite her bottom lip, refusing the urge to yell at him for telling her she didn't look good. She had to remind herself that, looks didn't matter anymore. Amara shrugged as she tugged Sairi's bag over a shoulder.  
  
"The powers are just taking awhile to heal me properly...guess that means some kinda trouble is brewing. No worries...I'll live..."  
  
He nodded and they made their way out of the car and towards the apartment of Cordelia Chase, the last person that Wolfram and Hart was aware of to have contact with Angel. Lindsey assumed that it didn't matter if she was with Angel or not...one of his employers would do just as well if Angel wasn't there.  
  
A reassuring smile was given to her as they entered the building. "You should be safe here..."  
  
The only reason I trusted Lindsey was because, well he was from my previous life. And I was happy to finally have someone who I knew from before...I felt a little better now that someone I knew was around. Before it had just been Sairi and I, he was my only companion...and while Sairi is a good friend...he didn't know me before...Lindsey did, he knew how I changed...Since I trust him, I let him thrust me into a total strangers care...who didn't seem to happy about the idea.  
  
-Harder To Breath-  
  
Maroon 5  
  
How dare you say that my behavior is unacceptable  
  
So condescending unnecessarily critical  
  
I have the tendency of getting very physical  
  
So watch your step cause if I do you'll need a miracle  
  
You drain me dry and make me wonder why I'm even here  
  
This Double Vision I was seeing is finally clear  
  
You want to stay but you know very well I want you gone  
  
Not fit to funkin' tread the ground I'm walking on  
  
When it gets cold outside and you got nobody to love  
  
You'll understand what I mean when I say  
  
There's no way we're gonna give up  
  
And like a little girl cries in the face of a monster that lives in her dreams  
  
Is there anyone out there cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe  
  
Is there anyone out there cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe  
  
What you are doing is screwing things up inside my head  
  
You should know better you never listened to a word I said  
  
Clutching your pillow and writhing in a naked sweat  
  
Hoping somebody someday will do you like I did  
  
When it gets cold outside and you got nobody to love  
  
You'll understand what I mean when I say  
  
There's no way we're gonna give up  
  
And like a little girl cries in the face of a monster that lives in her dreams  
  
Is there anyone out there cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe  
  
Is there anyone out there cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe  
  
Does it kill  
  
Does it burn  
  
Is it painful to learn  
  
That it's me that has all the control  
  
Does it thrill  
  
Does it sting  
  
When you feel what I bring  
  
And you wish that you had me to hold 


	3. Devil With A Black Dress On

Chapter Two: Devil With A Black Dress On  
  
"Why should I protect her? It could be a trap..." Angel had objected to the idea almost as soon as it left Lindsey's lips. Amara stood behind Lindsey, not really looking around. Her blue eyes glued to the floor as Lindsey fought for her to be protected. Sairi was making himself comfortable in Cordelia's lap, who was smiling and rubbing his stomach.  
  
"What are you doing?" Angels voice held the questioning tone of 'please don't tell me you're falling for this.' While she just looked up from playing with the fox, a broad smile on her face white teeth showing.   
  
"I like him."   
  
"I like you to sweetheart...jus' keep a-rubbin'" Sairi was in heaven, Amara glanced up and rolled her eyes. She had never given him that much attention before...mostly because he was always the barer of bad news...she swayed for a moment and gave a quick as silent as she could manage cough into her hand, not wanting to draw a lot of attention to herself.  
  
There was another man in the room, besides the woman and the vampire. He was in a wheel-chair, obviously to Amara recovering from an accident. "There is only one way to prove that she is an immortal like he says she is...and even then we don't know if we can trust her..." His accent was British, and she liked listening to it, it reminded her of the UK, even if what he did say was slightly hurtful to her. They wouldn't trust her because Lindsey was the one that brought her here, to her that just didn't seem right.  
  
"What way?" Both Angel and Lindsey asked at the same time, both looking at each other the moment after they said that with death glares.   
  
Wesley moved his chair to sit behind Amara, "I hope you don't mind...but we must find out..." He said pulling up the back of her tank top, causing her to go stiff for a moment as everyone in the room gathered behind her gazing at her back. "She has the mark."  
  
Her pale lower back held a four inch marking, it looked like a regular tattoo to anyone else...but these people were pros they knew what it meant "The infinity symbol?" She blinked, that was Angels voice. Somehow she felt ashamed, her head hung low and she gave another slight cough...all she wanted to do was lay down and sleep.   
  
"It's the mark the powers give one of their immortals...meaning, she's good...she works for the powers. That would explain the talking fox, sometimes that's how they connect the person with them, by an animal enchanted with a human personality..." Wesley explained to everyone, Angel just nodded and Cordelia continued to play with Sairi.  
  
Amara just continued to gaze towards the ground, she hated this...going to someone for help. She shouldn't have to do this, she was an immortal for Christ's sake, but apparently even immortals needed help, no matter how much she didn't want help. Lindsey and Angel continued to bicker back and forth to each other while Wesley still studied her, she could see Sairi from the corner of her eyes. He seemed to be having no problems adjusting, but he wasn't the one that felt as though their soul was on fire now was he?   
  
I wish I could have stayed with Lindsey, these people...well only Angel and Wesley seemed cold towards me, just because of who brought me here. The woman, well...she was still happily playing with the fox, no judgments from her had been made yet. I know that if I was in their position I wouldn't trust me either...but it hurts, when the only person I knew from my old life walked out the front door I refused the urge to hug him. I...didn't hug people, I didn't do a lot of things any more...  
  
Lindsey had left and the only sound in the room left was the noises that Sairi and Cordelia were making every now and again, sitting on the couch in her living-room the small fox was on her lap, so happy Amara presumed that if he were a cat he would be purring...very loudly at the current moment. Angel and Wesley sat around the table that was more of a book shelf then a table. Both recent and old books scattered about the table, papers that looked years old tossed aimlessly on the table. Both men were currently rummaging and speaking in hushed tones as they looked for something in the pile of things.  
  
"I think we should trust her..." Wesley started, picking up a book and placing it on the floor next to him, "She doesn't seem to have any side...and if what Lindsey tells us is true..."  
  
"But what if he is lying? After all, he did go straight back to Wolfram and Hart after the last time we helped him. Besides wouldn't he want immortality?"  
  
"Of course he would...but, what kind of person would lock up an immortal and drink their blood to become immortal?"  
  
*-.-.-.-.-.-.-*  
  
Lilah Morgan was currently pacing in her office, everything about her was perfection. To the very last detail she made sure she did and got everything right. This time though...she didn't get it right. A gnawing fear was growing in her stomach, sometimes when people at Wolfram and Hart messed up...they well...died to keep it short and simple. She for one was to young to die, to much of a good career, to beautiful...  
  
She adjusted her green dress jacket as she took a few deep breaths in. This was it, this was the deep end...she knew they already knew. After all, Wolfram and Hart knew everything really. They had everything at their disposal and they used it to the full extent that they could...and now she had to be the better person and tell Holland that she screwed up with the simplest task.  
  
Moving towards her desk she fumbled with the phone for a moment with her nervousness and pressed a red button paging her secretary. "Madison, please hold my calls for an hour." With that she left her office, and headed up the hall, the fear growing and engulfing her as she walked along the hallway.   
  
Minutes later after speaking with someone at a desk in front of his office she managed to explain in a bit of a stumble that she was here due to an emergency and needed to see Mr. Manners as soon as she could, she was let into his large office and the moment she stepped in she wanted to leave. She wanted to run away from the office she was currently standing in as fast as possible and as far away as she could get.  
  
"Sir..."  
  
"I know...you lost her..."  
  
"The reports were confirmed though, she is the immortal that they sensed earlier. She just disappeared after leaving the park. We had a team try to follow her, but she was lead to some Karaoke bar, she never left according to them. Now we can't find her..."  
  
"Does Lindsey know yet?" Holland asked, with a smile on his elder face as calm as ever.  
  
"Yes...he seems to be dealing with the situation..."  
  
"Very well then. I'm sure we will find her soon, and then we won't have to worry about anything ever again."  
  
"Yes sir..."  
  
I had never really felt so out of place, it seemed like every time I looked up from the floor every one was watching me. After a while of looking on the table for the right book Wesley proclaimed that Immortals, were normally inclined to do the right thing, so apparently that gave me the all clear in his book...while Angel still looked at me like he was ready to attack me for moving an inch. Which I had done after a while of standing, Cordelia invited me to sit next to her and Sairi on the couch. For awhile the room had been silent, I wasn't really paying attention. I just wanted to lay down somewhere and curl up into a ball...and never wake up [but that was to much to ask] Everyone around me talked, and I sat, ignoring it all. I didn't want to be there.   
  
"So she'll stay here with me then and you and Wesley can bunk?" She was still happily playing with Sairi, who to Cordelia was well the best kind of pet she could think to have...after all it was furry, and small, and it talked. There could be nothing better then a talking fox...Angel shook his head, and Wesley's head went up from the book he was currently skimming through.  
  
"I don't believe that is such a good idea, you see...what would happen if Wolfram and Hart found out she was here...? They would attack you and take her...it's best if Angel stays here too..."  
  
"But...there isn't enough room." She objected, even though she had changed into care giving Cordelia she still didn't want to give up her nice warm comfy bed. There were only two places to sleep in her apartment, the bed and the couch. The third option was the floor...the hardwood...floor.  
  
"I can sleep on the floor..." Amara spoke up, drawing everyone's attention back to her. She glanced up, looking around the room with an arched brow. Angel opened his mouth to say something but she cut him off. "Look, I just need a place to lay down...I've been in worse places...besides I'd feel better if I took the floor and didn't kick my protector off the comfy furniture..."  
  
"No you see it's really no problem...I should sleep on the floor, more of a surprise if we get ambushed and I'm on the floor...in front of the door..."  
  
"Whatever."  
  
"Do you really think we will get ambushed?!" Cordelia squealed, causing Sairi to rock in her lap slightly, almost loosing balance and falling...but managed to catch himself on Amara's pant leg before he reached the floor.  
  
"It's better to be safe then sorry." Wesley added into the conversation, shutting his book he was working on, pulling of his glasses and rubbing the bridge of his nose for a moment. "It's getting late, I best be getting back home..."  
  
"Okay, come back here in the morning then? We can finish researching then..." Angel said, as his arms folded across his chest dark eyes looking towards Amara who was still looking at the floor...and she wasn't looking any healthier then when she came there. Wesley started out and Angel silently followed him, no one in the room knew he was gone...Amara was to busy looking at the floor and wishing to lay down while Cordelia was currently chatting about a role she wanted for television, while Sairi was commenting on what shows he liked to watch.  
  
At the elevator Angel stood next to Wesley, his hands folded across his chest once again. It seemed he had been on the defense ever since she got there. "What do you think we can do?"  
  
"Honestly? Nothing. There are no spells to do much, she can't leave the city...because they will follow her...and the only choice we really have is to protect her. We can't do much other then that."  
  
"If they get their hands on her...it will be the end of us, they will be giving her blood to everyone who works for them...meaning assassins that want us dead."  
  
"Oh so you changed your mind?" Wesley questioned, causing Angel to have a confused look.  
  
"On what?"  
  
"Your opinion on the girl, before you wanted to boot her out...and now you want to protect her?"  
  
"Well...you got to understand, that it was Lindsey who...well...I can't blame her for that can I? But still, I don't trust this, someone is going to get hurt during all of this."  
  
"I think someone is already hurt." Wesley pointed out, glancing back towards Cordelia's door.  
  
"She didn't look good did she?"  
  
"Not by far, though I've read many times that some Immortals have intense pain due to their soul longing for the grave."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yes, I presume that is what is wrong with the girl. Hopefully she gets over it enough to be able to fight soon....because once Wolfram and Hart know she's here...that's all we will be doing."  
  
"Don't I know it."  
  
Everything was quiet around me, and I enjoyed it to no end. No sooner then when Angel walked back in the room did Cordelia announce she was going to get some blankets and pillows for me. The ones on the couch had been tossed to Angel, who had obviously been sleeping on her couch. I wonder why, but it's not really that important. Once my blankets were handed to me I was all to happy to lay down, Sairi announced that he was going to keep Cordelia company, which confused me all to hell. Why would he...well...I guess that was his choice. The lights were turned off and once everything went silent I noticed how alone I felt. I wrapped the blanket up close to my face, and gazed up at the ceiling. The laying down helped out a little bit, but the pain I had been feeling all day was still intense. I didn't fall asleep, I could hear the dripping of a sink not to far off and every now and again I heard Angel move about where he was trying to sleep on the floor. It was going to be one of those nights....  
  
Angel could tell who was asleep in the apartment and who wasn't, currently the only one sleeping was Cordelia. Amara he heard by her breathing was still awake, and her fox companion was slowly moving across the apartment. His paws making an almost silent sound as he wandered around stopping every now and again.  
  
Slowly he fell into an uneasy sleep, Angel didn't like it when strangers were around him...but he needed sleep if he wanted to fight whatever Wolfram and Hart was going to throw at them. After awhile he awoke to Sairi and Amara speaking to each other in hushed tones that he was only able to hear due to his enhanced senses.   
  
"I thought you were going to sleep with the girl?"   
  
"She isn't nearly as comfortable as you are." Sairi teased and curled up on Amara's stomach, a yawn escaping his muzzle.  
  
"Really?"  
  
"No, I felt bad leaving you out hear alone..." This statement caused a sigh from Amara and a slight roll of her eyes.  
  
"You felt bad?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Since when do you feel bad?"  
  
"Listen--" He cut her off from whatever smart-assed comment she was going to say, "The powers have been chirping all night long. I just don't want to leave you...alone."  
  
"Don't trust the vampire?" She asked, with a small yawn as she tried to get into a comfortable position...but that didn't work, it seemed that no matter what position you put yourself in while feeling like you are being burned alive won't help.  
  
"No, I do...it's jus'...listen something is going to happen...it's already been decided. And even a champion can't protect you..."  
  
"So what you are saying is you're trying to get in as much time with me as you can..."  
  
"Well...yeah, I guess. I know you want to go off and finally rest...but once you do. What happens to me ya know? I mean...do I go back to bein' a fox? Or...do I die too? I'm not keen on dying."  
  
"Neither was I...it's not really that bad I guess...kinda like...well do you remember how it was before you were born?"  
  
"No..."  
  
"Exactly...it's like that."  
  
"What do you mean?" He questioned moving his position.  
  
"What do you think I mean?"   
  
"Bah, yer talkin' in riddles again...aren't I supposed to be the one that does that?"  
  
She sighed, "Yeah yeah..." Moving the blanket back a little bit she wrapped her hands around Sairi and tucked him under with her, turning on her side and holding him as if he were a teddy bear. "Let's just sleep...I'm tired."  
  
"You're sick..."  
  
"Dead people can't be sick." A yawn escaped her pale lips as she said that and slowly she fell asleep with Sairi atop of her...whispering one last statement before falling into never-never land as well...  
  
"If you only knew..."  
  
I was happy Sairi had come to me, rather then sleep with Cordelia...I wasn't about to show that I was happy, but it was good to be able to hold him. Feel his fur rub up against my chin, it was a comfort to the thoughts that were running in my head. They weren't happy thoughts, they were thoughts of what would happen to me if Wolfram and Hart finds me...it's funny though...the company that my father was going to work for, was going to make me a human blood bar. Or at least that's what I assumed they were going to do...no one really would tell me anything as of late.  
  
-Devil With A Black Dress On-  
  
Jack Off Jill  
  
Wash off those scabs dear  
  
Or fingernail pick them clean  
  
Pray to all your long lost demons  
  
And justify your means  
  
Devil has a new shape  
  
Devil has a new ride  
  
Devil has a problem but he locks it up inside  
  
Shit angel  
  
Kids sure like the devil these days  
  
And I'm the devil with the black dress on  
  
Do you want to own me angel  
  
Cause I own you now you're gone  
  
Kids sure like the devil these days  
  
And I'm the devil with the black dress on  
  
Do you want to hate me angel  
  
Cause I hate you now you're gone  
  
Did you believe it cause I said so  
  
Did you believe it was true  
  
Did you believe it cause I said so angel  
  
I sure lied to you  
  
Did you believe it cause I said so  
  
Did you believe it was true  
  
I'm eternal and infernal and I sure lied to you  
  
Shit angel  
  
Kids sure like the devil these days  
  
And I'm the devil with the black dress on  
  
Do you want to own me angel  
  
Cause I own you now you're gone  
  
Kids sure like the devil these days  
  
And I'm the devil with the black dress on  
  
Do you want to hate me angel  
  
Cause I hate you now you're gone  
  
Good girl with the black eyes  
  
Believe in future past  
  
Everything that I want happens  
  
See how long that lasts  
  
Devil has a hot rod  
  
Devil high on speed  
  
Devil has a black dress  
  
So her arms can bleed  
  
Kids sure like the devil these days  
  
And I'm the devil with the black dress on  
  
Do you want to know me angel  
  
Cause I know you now you're gone  
  
Kids sure like the devil these days  
  
And I'm the devil with the black dress on  
  
Do you want to hurt me angel  
  
Cause I'm hurting now you're gone  
  
Go go go gone  
  
Go go go gone  
  
Go go go go go go go 


	4. Bother

Chapter Three: Bother  
  
I had awoken to the sound of someone screaming...well, not screaming...rather a yelping sound had been made. The moment I heard it my body snapped up, Sairi was knocked off to the floor and I was up on my feet in seconds sword picked up from where it rested next to the sofa. Apparently it was a false alarm...the woman, Cordelia was having a vision. She was Angel's connection to the PTB. Seeing how they pained her I wondered if Sairi was ever in pain when he heard their messages. Angel was smothering the woman for a while, asking 'are you okay?' over and over again while I just sat on the sofa. Finally she managed to sputter out what the vision was about.  
  
"A woman was being attacked by some kind of demon..."  
  
"Where?"  
  
A few minutes later Angel was on the phone with Wesley explaining the situation, every now and again glancing back to the bedroom where Cordelia decided to lay back down after taking pain killers. Sairi was laying next to her comfortably on the bed.   
  
"Yeah, she said it would be dark out when it happened..."  
  
"That's rather odd now isn't it? Normally the powers don't send us such advanced warnings..." Wesley stated from his side of the conversation on the phone.  
  
"Yes, well I guess we have something to do tonight...stake out the alley and wait for the woman. It should be simple enough, though we have to bring the girl with..."  
  
"Amara?"  
  
"Yeah, I don't want to leave her alone with Cordelia..." His voice was accusing still, but Amara couldn't hear it from where she sat on the sofa, her body hunched forward leaning over her sword.   
  
"You still don't think you can trust the girl?"  
  
"Well...no...well, okay yeah I don't think we can trust her...at least not yet. Anyway, I want to see what she can do..."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Just in case she needs to fight." With that Angel, ever the mysterious hung up the phone. There was really no need for more conversation, he sat on a chair next to the book piled table, his dark hues never leaving Amara. She did look sick, maybe...she wasn't that much of a threat. In the middle of this thought she looked up, straight at him. Her ice colored eyes blinking a few times, they were tinted a slight red color from lack of sleep most likely.  
  
"Stop."  
  
"Stop what?" Angel asked, standing up slowly.  
  
"That...you...you...act like just because Lindsey brought me here I'm...going to like slaughter you any minute..."  
  
"Well, what if you are...I mean Lindsey isn't exactly a good guy." To that Amara stood up, the sword falling from her lap and clattering on the floor.  
  
"He's not a bad guy...just..."  
  
"Just what?" He cut her off before she could finish. Apparently the bad blood between him and Lindsey was causing him to neglect the fact that he was supposed to be protecting her instead of accusing her.  
  
"Never mind...obviously you don't care...I don't know why I let him talk me into coming here." With that she bent down and picked up her sword, placing it into her belt she made her way towards the door. To which Angel stepped in front of.  
  
"Where do you think you're going?"  
  
"Well, I don't really feel like putting up with this. So I'm leaving..."   
  
"No, you aren't."   
  
Amara raised her brows, she really didn't feel like putting up with this. She knew Lindsey wanted to help her, but this wasn't something she could handle right now. She pushed her way past him, and began to unlock the door, until he gripped her shoulder and pulled her back. A fist was raised and brought to his jaw.   
  
"Just let me go, you don't want me here...I don't want to be here so what's the fucking problem?" At that Angel just stepped back, if she didn't want to be here then that was her own problem. She finished unlocking the door and went out, not even shutting it as she left.  
  
Okay, I know...that wasn't the best thing to do...but you try to stay somewhere where a VAMPIRE was accusing you of being a bad guy. So where am I going to go now? I can't just leave, I have to see Lindsey first...it's not like I just needed to see him before I left...but I just wanted to...he was the only thing I had left from my old life. The only one I knew...I just wanted to say good-bye.  
  
"How could you let her go?" Sairi asked from his perch on the table, clearly he was angry...not only did his voice show it, but he was growling slightly too.   
  
"She wanted to go, I wasn't going to hold her here against her will..." Angel stated, from the chair that Sairi and Cordelia found him in when they woke up. He had been brooding there, and that told them both that something happened when Amara had been no where to be seen.  
  
"Angel, I know you don't like the fact that Lindsey brought her here...but what happens when Wolfram and Hart gets her?" Cordelia asked after placing a cup of milk infront of Sairi.   
  
"I...didn't think about that." And honestly he didn't, at least not to the point of Wolfram and Hart getting to her. She seemed like the feisty type, she would be able to get away from them right? He shook his head and stood up. "I'll go find her..."  
  
  
  
"Do you think she'll listen to you?" Sairi asked watching as Angel moved towards the door to head down to the basement.   
  
"I don't know..." And with that he left, slipping on his coat as he went.  
  
*-.-.-.-.-*  
  
"Hold your horses!" It had been a long night, and after just going to sleep only three hours previously he didn't want to wake up. After all, he had to catch up on his beauty sleep. Green feet slipped into red slippers before moving towards the door that was currently being slammed on as if their life depended on it. A yawn escaped his mouth as he pulled the front door open.  
  
"Hey."  
  
A blink was given, he wasn't expecting to see her in a while at least from what the little fox had told him. "Well, hey there Sweet-ums, come in...come in." He stepped back, allowing the girl inside of the club.   
  
"Hi Lorne, sorry about leaving so suddenly the other night." Amara said adjusting the shirt she was wearing, it was a simple gray tank top, a few splatters of crimson covered the front of it just slightly.   
  
"Not to worry, not to worry. The job is still your's if you want it..." He spoke while leading her into the bar area, he himself stepping behind the bar and pouring her a drink of whatever was on tap.  
  
"Job?"  
  
"As a bouncer...don'tcha remember?" He pushed the amber liquid filled glass towards her as she took a seat on a bar stool. "And why isn't Sairi with you?"  
  
"Bouncer? Oh, yeah...I'm sorry...I forgot...lot's of things on my mind. Sairi is probably still with Angel I guess...I dunno...right now I don't care."She placed her arms on the bar top and rested her head in them after she finished her drink. Ice colored eyes looked over Lorne in amusement. He was wearing bright blue silk pajamas. What kind of demon wore bright blue silk pajamas? She just shrugged to herself in her head and continued to rest. She was so tired...  
  
After leaving Cordelias place she found herself back at the motel taking pain killers and changing her clothes after a long hot shower. And now she was at Lornes, mostly because this was the only place she knew Lindsey came to.   
  
"Angel? Hmm, I've heard that name before quite a few times. Vampire with a soul iddn't he?"  
  
"Yeah...listen, do you know a Lindsey McDonald?"  
  
"Oh yeah, what a voice on him...he used to come here a lot before he lost his hand..."  
  
"Do you know where he lives?"   
  
"Hmm...I think I might..."  
  
I didn't feel good, it was the kind of sickness where...everything didn't feel right, the moment that Lorne disappeared into the back room to see if he had Lindsey's address anywhere was the moment I fell asleep at the bar. Sleep, that stopped the pain. Though I know I shouldn't be sleeping right now, I should try to be getting out of this god forsaken city...but, I really...didn't care....  
  
Lindsey sat rather nervously at the table, he was surrounded by his coworkers and boss...as long as no one knew anything was a miss...as long as they didn't think he had something to do with it...he was fine. It was one strike and you're out here, but he got off his first strike, made it up by loosing his hand...and now, what did he have to loose? His life...  
  
"That's all for today..." Holland announced at the head of the table, people around Lindsey getting up and leaving while he just stayed put...to deep in thought to notice those leaving. "Lindsey?"  
  
"Yes, sir?" His head finally snapped up at his name being called, and then he noticed that no one was in the room with them.  
  
"Is everything okay? You seem a little out of it today..." Holland questioned with near sincerity as he moved towards Lindsey, perching himself up on the table and folding his hands in his lap.  
  
"Yeah...I'm fine, just haven't gotten a lot of sleep." Of course that wasn't the full truth...but it would do, at least for now.   
  
"Thinking about the immortal?"  
  
"Amara." Lindsey corrected, how could they talk to her like she was just some mystical creature. She wasn't...she was a...a...girl...a person.  
  
  
  
"Amara? How close were you two before?"  
  
"How close?" A slight chuckle escaped Lindsey's lips, "We weren't really close...her father, Jake is the one who basically took me in, he helped me get a scholarship, he helped me get to where I am today."  
  
"So then why are you so defensive about her?"  
  
"It's just – She's still a human, still...it's hard when you know them. But don't worry sir...it won't affect my work any longer." That was a lie in its fullest, it was going to affect him until he knew she was safe...which ment his work was on a downward slop here on out.  
  
"Ah, lets see that it doesn't...after all...she's just a girl." With that Holland rose from his spot on the table, his aged hand patting Lindsey's shoulder slightly before he exited the room, leaving the young man on his own with his thoughts.  
  
  
  
Why was he so defensive when it came to her? After all, when he had known her she had been an annoying little brat who thought she could get anything she wanted just because she was pretty, popular, and rich...but now...she changed, into a better person. He had to help her, Jake would want him to. He had to stop whatever they had planned.  
  
*-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-*  
  
The room was dark and cold, there was nothing in the room except for one dim light in the corner coming from a camera monitor, two men in blue jumpers were installing what looked like chains and cuffs on the gray brick wall of the basement.   
  
"How's it going?" Holland asked, peeking into the room taking a glance around.   
  
"The shackles are being installed right now, no way it will be able to get out of the chains..." The suited man to Holland's left said, glancing down to a clip board. "The camera was installed yesterday, and the door is deadbolted from the outside...only way to open it is with an optic scan."  
  
"Good work, any other news?"   
  
"No sir, the room should be ready later tonight."  
  
"Okay then, all we need to do now is to find it. Damn immortal, it will be a pain to catch her."  
  
I didn't wake up for a while, and when I did...I greatly regretted it...I had been sometime during my sleep been placed in Lornes room. It must have been by one of the bar tenders, because there was no way Lorne would have been able to pick me up and carry me in here all by himself. My head was splitting in half when I woke up, I wandered into the bathroom and before I could splash some water on my face like I had been planning to, I noticed my nose had bleed...that...wasn't right. I washed it off and swallowed the pain that was still gnawing at my body before walking out into the bar area of the club.  
  
Amara raised a confused brow when she walked into the club, other then the fact that it wasn't as busy as it had been the other night she noticed Sairi perched on a stool on stage singing 'Love Machine' while Lorne was yacking it up with Angel, Wesley, and Cordelia...apparently Sairi had brought them here.  
  
"Well, bout time ya woke up and joined the livin' kitten..."   
  
She rubbed her eyes for a moment and yawned before plopping down on a stool next to the group. "Thanks Lorne, appreciate the bed..."  
  
"It's no problem...woah, hang on a minute...Sairi is just about ready to get to a good part...can't miss singing it with the little fella..." He stated zipping away from the four, the group that immediately went silent the moment he went away. Apparently neither side didn't know what to say.  
  
"Look Angel"  
  
"Look Amara..." if the situation wasn't what it was they both would have laughed, but neither of them were much on the humor filled side that night. Amara receded and let Angel say what he wished to.  
  
"I'm sorry. There I said it..." He stated looking over towards Cordelia, who apparently was the one that wanted him to apologize in the first place. She elbowed him in the ribs, causing an amused look to be pasted onto Amara's features. "I mean...I shouldn't have judged you based on my past with Lindsey..."  
  
"I'm sorry too." She cut to the chase, not caring to elaborate and stuck her hand out in truce. Angel glanced down at her gloved hand for a moment before wrapping his around it and shaking. "Friends?"  
  
"Yeah..."  
  
'Just a love machine...and I wont work for anyone but you.' All eyes went on Lorne and Sairi, who were both singing and to an extent...dancing.  
  
"Oh...my...god." Cordelia exclaimed, her mouth open in a horrified manor, a mirror image of Wesley, Angel, and Amara's face.   
  
"It's...like a car crash...you want to look away..." Amara started  
  
"But you just can't" Everyone finished for her.   
  
Well, I guess I'm happy now...I mean how can't I? It seems that I've finally got friends again. To a point anyway. I guess I still have to prove myself to Angel...but, the others...the Brit, Wesley I think he might be able to help me find out what demon killed my family and I. Revenge for me, has never been a big thing...but while I have the resource to find out...I might as well. Things seem to be getting better...but better never lasts for long...  
  
"You'll be able to find her then?" Holland sat at the head of the table, Lindsey and Lilah on opposite sides of him as though they were his faithful servants ready to do whatever he wished, while the one he was talking to was at the very end of the table, standing...  
  
"Yes." The voice was deep, booming, and it would and could strike fear into everyone's heart. The creature stood at over eight feet tall, a billowing black hooded cloak hid everything about him, face...hands...feet. It was as if he was just the black fabric he wore...maybe he was, but they weren't about to ask questions.  
  
"Then go...you'll be repaid fruitfully if you find her before tomorrow." With that, the thing disappeared, leaving nothing but smoke in its midst.   
  
Lilah was the first to speak, "Well, that was interesting...he seems like the type to...get his job done." She stood, hands running over her dress suit for a moment to make sure all was adjusted before she folded her papers and glanced over towards Holland for permission to leave for her next meeting without having to ask him. He nodded,  
  
"Yes, I agree...if he can't get it done...no one can. Don't you agree?"   
  
"Huh? What? Oh...yeah...I mean yes sir. I agree...we should have her by the morning then." Lindsey gulped...and picked up his briefcase before leaving the room. He had to get to her before the end of the night...  
  
*-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-*  
  
"No, I don't think it looked like that..." Amara stated next to Wesley as he pointed to a portrait of a demon in a rather old and yellowed book at Cordelias table. They had been sitting there for over three hours with no luck on finding the demon. Angel, was sitting on the sofa, looking like he was in some sort of deep thought...but actually he had been watching Sairi who had for the moment thought he was hidden well enough to stuff some 'shiny' things into the bag that Amara normally carried around for him. So far Angel counted four forks, a watch, and two marbles. What an interesting creature.  
  
Meanwhile, Cordelia had taken leave into her bedroom, falling asleep in a mere matter of moments from when they got home. From the table Amara sighed slightly, "Thanks for the help Wesley...but I don't think we will find the demon. It doesn't really matter I guess..." She spoke, while turning a page to one of the books infront of her. "I just wanted to find out if my family was really slaughtered because of me...or something else...ever since I found out that the law firm daddy was going to work at was evil I thought maybe they had a hand in it...but why would they want to kill off an employee who never lost a case?" Amara mostly spoke to herself, rather then Wesley...Sairi jumped up onto the table, and someone tapped at the front door.  
  
Angel rose, an ax in his hand ready to fight if need be...but not many evil people knocked these days. He opened the door and frowned. "Lindsey."  
  
"Angel."  
  
"What do you want?" He asked, opening the door a little more, now able to notice that Lindsey was holding a back pack.  
  
"I'm here, to help...give you all the information I have..."  
  
"In exchange for?"  
  
"Your protection."  
  
"What?"  
  
"If I stay at Wolfram and Hart any longer, they will find out eventually that I had a hand in Amara coming here...they won't be pleased."  
  
"I don't think so...remember the last time you came to us?" Angel asked, while Wesley and Amara got up from their spots to see what was going on.  
  
"I know, I've made some – I mean a lot of mistakes...but, please...something very dangerous is after her now."  
  
"What?!" Wesley, Angel, and Amara said at nearly the sametime in question and in exclamation. "What's after me?" Amara asked, pushing her way beside Angel so she could get in closer to the conversation.  
  
"They call it 'No-Name'...the senior partners summoned him to find her, apparently he is..."  
  
"Very hard to kill..." Wesley finished for him, causing Angel to turn slightly.  
  
"You know of it?"  
  
"It's every watchers worst nightmare...No-Name is what they send when they want someone found...it...it never fails..."  
  
I...for the first time since I had found out Wolfram and Hart were after me...I...felt worried sick. As we sat around Lindsey, after Angel finally let him in and he explained what the law firm was actually going to do to me...I felt as though my stomach was on fire, I felt...I was truly scared for the first time since I came back to life...I was scared that...I don't know, I couldn't have been scared of dying...but something else...living...in pain...in this kind of pain...I...why me?  
  
  
  
Lindsey had been aloud to stay, even Angel agreed that it was a good idea. How could he not? The man basically signed his own death warrant by telling them what he knew. Wesley and Angel could be heard from the kitchen speaking in as hushed tones as they could get while Amara and Lindsey sat on the sofa, not really speaking rather then gazing off into space while Sairi moved back and forth from Cordelia's bedroom to his bag.  
  
"I...why are you helping me?" Amara finally asked, glancing up towards the older man who looked a reck. His dress clothes were disheveled, and his hair looked as if he had combed it with his hand way to many times.   
  
"You...I...I mean...you're a friend. Your father helped me get my life on the right track, I owe it to him to help you."  
  
"Oh..."  
  
"And I just wouldn't feel right, knowing what they are going to...planning to do to you if they get a hold of you."  
  
  
  
"I don't really want to think about that."  
  
"Me either..."  
  
The living room fell silent for a while, until the quiet was broken by a coughing fit from Amara, her hand over her mouth as she coughed so hard Lindsey thought she might hack up a lung. "Are you okay?" He asked as her coughing finally started to stop.   
  
She pulled her hand away, glancing at it oddly for a moment Lindsey was about to ask what was so interesting about her hand until he caught what she was looking at...crimson, blood...over her pale hand and glove. "I...don't think I'm okay..." She stated looking up towards him, a drop of blood falling from the corner of her lip to her lap.  
  
-Bother-  
  
Stone Sour  
  
Wish I was too dead to cry  
  
My self-affliction fades  
  
Stones to throw at my creator  
  
Masochists to which I cater  
  
You don't need to bother;  
  
I don't need to be   
  
I'll keep slipping farther  
  
But once I hold on,  
  
I won't let go 'til it bleeds  
  
Wish I was too dead to care  
  
If indeed I cared at all  
  
Never had a voice to protest  
  
So you fed me shit to digest  
  
I wish I had a reason;  
  
my flaws are open season  
  
For this, I gave up trying  
  
One good turn deserves my dying  
  
You don't need to bother;  
  
I don't need to be  
  
I'll keep slipping farther  
  
But once I hold on,  
  
I won't let go 'til it bleeds  
  
Wish I'd died instead of lived  
  
A zombie hides my face  
  
Shell forgotten  
  
with its memories  
  
Diaries left  
  
with cryptic entries  
  
And you don't need to bother;  
  
I don't need to be  
  
I'll keep slipping farther  
  
But once I hold on,  
  
I won't let go 'til it bleeds  
  
You don't need to bother;  
  
I don't need to be  
  
I'll keep slipping farther  
  
But once I hold on...  
  
I'll never live down my deceit 


	5. Feel

Chapter Four: Feel  
  
AN: I just want to thank those that have reviewed so far [ It's you guys that are making me continue to write this fic]   
  
I don't...I don't understand what's going on with me lately. I've felt so sick, and now...I'm...coughing up blood? I don't think that's supposed to happen. Not to an immortal like me anyway. Angel smelled the blood, causing a scene of Angel exclaiming that I was supposed to be an immortal...something I exclaimed as well. Wesley, being the only sane one of the group started to go through his books. I had started coughing again, and with blood now caking my hands I took my leave and headed for the showers. After all, there wasn't much else I could do...right? Ever since I got to LA I didn't do anything...why am I here?  
  
Three men gathered around the book covered table, Wesley adjusting his glasses for a moment before turning another page in the old book infront of him. While across the table Lindsey and Angel were trying not to get on each others nerves while they looked in every book they could on the table.  
  
"I don't think it's a spell...most immortals, you see; are made to be immune to that sort of thing." The watcher in Wesley coming out for the moment as he shut the book in front of him. Needless to say, he was stumped by the situation presented to them. "I wonder, why aren't the powers healing her?"  
  
"Maybe the powers are...letting her die." The moment the words escaped Angel's lips, Lindsey was up out of his chair.  
  
"Well why would they do that? I thought she had a destiny to fulfill, that's why they brought her back. She isn't supposed to die before she finishes what she was meant to in life." He, didn't want her to die...again. For some odd reason he had grown attached to Amara, maybe it was the fact that she was the only thing that proved to him...he used to be a good man...before he came here to LA.   
  
"No...I think you misunderstand what Angel is trying to say...I think he means that, the Powers are aware of Wolfram and Harts plan...meaning, well they are making sure that Wolfram and Hart doesn't become immortal."  
  
"It doesn't make since though...why would they kill her now? I'm sure she almost got her blood drank tons of times..."  
  
"Yes well...Wolfram and Hart probably has the right spell...meaning that the Powers see them as a new major threat. It makes me wonder..." Wesley started to explain, trailing off for a moment putting a hand to his jaw in thought.  
  
"If they are killing off the other immortals as well..." Angel finished for him, all men now leaned away from the books faces worn and tired from research as they all sulked now.  
  
"I think I will call Giles, he might have some contacts to see if I can get a hold of any immortals..." Wesley left the table, leaving Angel and Lindsey sitting there...although they weren't the best of friends right now, Angel had stopped growling finally.  
  
Sometimes, I stop to think...maybe all of this, my family dying, me becoming immortal was to teach me a lesson from the way I was before...I was so vein, and now I'm paying for it. As I washed away the blood the first of the fear really set in. The Powers were letting me die...I was going to die again, and as much as I wanted it...as much as I wanted to rest...I didn't want to...die...  
  
Under the shower she stood, letting the hot water hit her washing away the crimson liquid that covered parts of her body. She had lost track of time as she stayed there in the bath tub. She supported her body by leaning on her hands which were pressed against the tiled wall. Reddish hair had plastered itself to her face after a little while of standing in that position. At the current moment she didn't really care about much. Just her thoughts drove her, fear, uncertainty, friendship...there wasn't much else to think about.   
  
She sat down in the tub, still letting the spray from the shower head hit her. Her knees bent and slender pale arms wrapped around them. She let her chin rest on one of her knees as a sigh escaped her lips. The shower wasn't making her feel much better, neither was being alone with only her thoughts. She didn't like her thoughts...they were always so dark.  
  
She wished she could just think about things that didn't matter, like make-up...or boys...but...she couldn't, those things were gone...those were the things that she couldn't worry about...those things were long gone. A knock on the door interrupted her pitiful thoughts, her head snapped up.  
  
"Mara are you okay?" She was surprised, not surprised that it was Lindsey...but surprised that someone was checking to see that she didn't croak while cleansing herself.  
  
"I'm fine, I'll be out in just a sec." She could hear him walk away, his footsteps fading as she assumed he headed into the living room. She sighed while rubbing her flushed face slightly, she should really stop thinking so much. Turning off the water that had managed to turn cold with-out her noticing she grabbed a towel and wrapped it around her before stepping out. Drying herself off quickly she dressed in the only clothes she brought with her, a pair of cut off old khaki shorts, and a faded black v-neck tee shirt that had a hole under the left breast. After drying and brushing her hair she left the bathroom, trying to leave all of her worries behind her.  
  
The moment I got out of the bathroom I glanced around and noticed that everyone had been looking at me funny. I glanced down at myself, no...no giant worm had pushed itself out of my stomach. What the hell were they looking at me like that for? Angel was still at the table, trying to look through a book instead of look at me, while Wesley just watched me while he was on the telephone now speaking in hushed tones. I plopped down on the couch next to Lindsey and noticed that even he was looking at me like I had grown another head. What the hell is going on?  
  
Lindsey watched as she came out of the bathroom, well she didn't look any better...still had circles around her eyes, and still a sickly pale color...but she didn't seem to be dying. He forced himself to look away from her and to his watch. It was almost three in the morning, Cordelia and Sairi were still sleeping peacefully while the rest of them were in a room so tense you could cut the air with a knife. No-Name hadn't found them yet...that was good. If it didn't find them yet...  
  
No, that was definitely hoping to much. They would be found, but hopefully Angel could fight it off. The moment that No-Name would find them was the moment that Wolfram and Hart would find out he betrayed them...that he went with the enemy. He...didn't care though, it felt good to be with the good guys. He found himself wondering about Darla, was anyone going to take care of her?  
  
Holland would probably make sure she was comfortable, Lindsey bit his lip for a moment and pushed his hair away from his eyes. Maybe he should tell Angel what Wolfram and Hart did...no...that would definitely be signing his own death warrant.   
  
Glancing to his left he noticed that Amara sat down next to him,   
  
"What you thinking about?"   
  
"Nothing really...just worried about No-Name and Wolfram and Hart..." He replied truthfully, no sense in lying now.   
  
She nodded, "Aren't we all..." Looking up, both Wesley and Angel ducked their heads from their respective places...they had been staring again. "I don't think it was such a good idea to come here...to LA. I just seem being more trouble then helpful..."  
  
"No...you're helpful..."  
  
"Name one way..." She asked looking up towards him with an arched brow, daring him to answer her question.  
  
"You got me to realize that I needed to leave Wolfram and Hart..."   
  
"How exactly?"  
  
"Well...here you are, back from the dead...here...I didn't expect you to change one bit...and yet you did...you became a better person I think...and...that gave me hope. If you could become a better person, maybe I can..."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yeah...you've changed for the better these past few years...while I changed for the worse. I want to be...like I was..."  
  
"A geek?" She asked, a small smile formed on her face as she inquired.  
  
"Funny..."  
  
"I thought so..."  
  
Things...dare I say seemed to be getting better around me for a few hours. After Lindsey and I talked I began to feel...a little less depressed. Kind of like I forgot about everything that could...and probably would happen. I just...lived in the moment. Wesley had gotten off the phone and moved over to the table with Angel, researching...while Lindsey and I talked...and then after awhile, we moved to the table as well.  
  
At the four AM hour mark things were quiet in the apartment, the occasional sound of a page turning from a book or a slight cough from Amara were the only sounds that had been made for awhile. Wesley looked dead on his feet, occasionally he would nod off only to be awoken when his head hit the book infront of him. Angel, was just mindlessly turning the pages off the book infront of him he was almost the mirror image of Lindsey, they were the only two that seemed awake in the room. While Amara simply leaned on Lindsey for head support as she dozed off.  
  
Cordelias bedroom door had been open so quick and suddenly, when it had slammed on the wall both the slightly sleeping Wesley and Amara nearly fell out of their seats, only to be saved by those sitting near them. Sairi, came out followed by Cordelia who was currently pulling on a jacket as fast as she could.  
  
"We have to go now!" Sairi announced, the moment he announced it Amara was up and securing her sword to her belt.  
  
"What do you mean we have to go?" Lindsey asked, while Angel got the picture and grabbed his coat an car keys.  
  
"In oh-say about fifteen minutes we all might be slaughtered if we stay here..." Cordelia filled him in while she tugged on a pair of shoes.  
  
"You had a vision?" Wesley grabbed one of his books as he spoke, who knew where they would end up...it might be good to have a book...just in case.  
  
"No, the powers contacted me..." Sairi spoke as he crawled into his bag, which Amara promptly picked up and strapped it to her back.  
  
Everything at that point became rushed, everyone heading downstairs to Angels car. No one had a clue where they would go, all they knew was that they had to get out of there fast from Sairi's warning.   
  
As they neared the car though...they found out it wasn't fast enough.  
  
Everything happened in a blur, the moment we seen it I tossed the bag with Sairi to Cordelia and told her to keep him safe. Lindsey grabbed my hand as I went to grip my sword, he said we could still run...get to his car...but Angel was already fighting. And I told him what I knew...that if we just ran now...we'd keep running. If I couldn't kill it now, then we wouldn't be able to kill it ever. He let my wrist go and I charged on  
  
Angel was thrown back into Wesley, attacking No-Name with his hands apparently wasn't a great idea. It seemed the creature could counter his attacks before he even planned on making them. Lindsey helped Angel up off of Wesley, as the three men turned in time to watch as Amara attacked the creature with her sword.  
  
She made a simple single move to slice through it's head, but apparently that wasn't working. The moment the blade entered it's neck, the sword was pulled into it's body, out of Amara's hands...and it simply for the moment disappeared.   
  
Amara's expression was that of simple fear, a few steps back were taken...demons...weren't supposed to be able to swallow swords into their body. It just didn't work that way...she blinked a few times, and didn't even get a chance to get back before her sword came back out of it's body, tip of the blade first straight out and pushed into her chest.  
  
Pain over took her body as the blood started to pour out of her mouth and chest, a step back was taken before she fell back to the ground. Why...wasn't she healing yet? Angel had jumped over her and pushed No-Name back, and started with the distraction while Lindsey ran up to Amara, pulling the sword out of her body. Under her torn and bloody shirt he was able to see the wound had started to close up. She was still coughing up blood, and her eyes were unfocused. It was now he prayed that Angel would be able to save them.  
  
But Angel was pushed back, much like before...Lindsey pushed himself between No-Name and Amara. It was no use though, the creature was going to get her no matter what was in the way...it followed orders to the tee.   
  
It's cloak opened, revealing nothing underneath...just darkness. It swept over and dropped down over both Lindsey and Amara. In seconds the cloak was gone, along with Amara and Lindsey.  
  
Angel got up, yet again he had landed on Wesley...looking around, Cordelia came out from behind a tree with Sairi in her hands. Sairi looked rather frightened for his charge, "We have to find her..."   
  
"I'm going to go get us some help, you two start gathering weapons..." Angel headed for his car, not caring to answer anyone questions on where he was going.  
  
"I guess we are going into Wolfram and Hart again..." Wesley started as he joined Cordelia in walking up to her apartment. "We should also look into what can kill this No-Name...other wise if we get her back...it will just be after her again."  
  
I didn't get a chance to be scared once No-Name got a hold of me, with the pain in my chest and the vision of Lindsey trying to protect me before I fell off into never-never land. When I awoke I regretted it, the pain in my chest was gone...but it was replaced by an extreme ache in my head the moment I opened my eyes they didn't have to adjust to the harsh bright light I had been expecting. Actually the room was...dark...and cold, when my eyes did adjust I noticed Lindsey slumped, unconscious in one corner. I tried to move towards him, but my arms were chained to the wall...figures.  
  
"Lin...lindsey?" Her voice was stubborn to come out after all of the blood that made it's way out of her throat and mouth. She pulled at the chains for awhile, trying to make any kind of noise that would awake the unconscious man. Unfortunately for her, it didn't work...he stayed slumped in the corner silent and unmoving.   
  
Still struggling with the chains, so much so that her wrists had begun to bleed after she rubbed the skin raw with the metal clasps. The bleeding stopped after awhile, well then...apparently the powers were healing her after all. Though, it wasn't as fast as she would have liked. There was a noise outside the door, it sounded like someone was unlocking it and then it was pushed open. She stopped tugging on her chains for a moment, her blue hues watching and waiting to see whoever came in.  
  
"Well, hello there Ms. Thompson." The man was slightly tall, his hair she could tell was graying as he passed under the dim light in the corner of the room, he also wore a suit much like the kind she had seen Lindsey wearing...and also ironically, he wore a kind expression. The closer he got, she raised her left leg to kick out at him...but that didn't work. There was a chain holding it down, she cursed under her breath, and the man just smiled.  
  
"I'm Holland Manners, welcome to Wolfram and Hart..."  
  
*-.-.-.-.-.-.-*  
  
"I don't think so man..."  
  
"Come on, if we don't...Wolfram and Hart will be running the show here."  
  
"Can't you vampires ever take a joke? Of course I'll help, the more dangerous the better."   
  
Angel sighed, while Gunn just grinned and gave a slight laugh. Angel, the moment leaving Cordelias place had set out to find the young street wise man, it didn't take long. He just had to listen for a little bit of trouble, and there was Gunn and his Crew fighting off a group of vampires. What was his plan exactly? Angel wasn't sure, he just needed to get Amara and as much as he hated to admit it...Lindsey back into their safety. When he got them back, he'd think about what to do next then...  
  
"We need your whole crew to help, I figure they are going to have her and Lindsey locked up tightly."  
  
"Don't worry man, I'll have it under control...so we meet outside W and H and charge in?"  
  
"That's about it...though it's more like meet in the sewer system..." Angel stated as he looked up at the sky which was slowly starting rise in the east. Gunn nodded, and headed back towards his truck.  
  
"See ya in a few hours then."  
  
*-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-*  
  
"It's almost sunrise..." Cordelia stated peeking out the window of her apartment, before turning to pick up Sairi who had been pacing back and forth behind her. "Stop that, I'm sure she's fine..." Walking over to the table that Wesley had been sitting ever since coming in from outside she set Sairi atop one of the books that wasn't being looked at.  
  
"What do you think's going to happen?" She asked Wesley, but instead Sairi in his panic answered.  
  
"They are going to cut her up, and people are going to drink from her like a vampire while someone else chants a spell. Although if she's lucky the powers will kill her before then...but if they kill her..." Sairi trailed off, jumping off the books and going to his bag.  
  
"What's up with him?" Cordelia asked Wesley who, ignored her...instead he tore out a few pages from the book he was reading.   
  
"After we get her, on the way back we need to collect some stuff from the magic shop near by...then we can do a protection spell over you're apartment...it will take a long while for them to get through it..." He explained while standing and pulling on his jacket. "I do expect Angel to be here soon...best be ready..."  
  
Cordelia went and picked up Sairi's bag and placed it over her shoulders before moving to pick up one of the lighter of the two weapon bags. "Are you okay Sairi?"  
  
"Great...never...better." He stated rather moodily as she felt him adjust his position in the bag. She blinked, and shrugged...glancing up as the door slammed open.  
  
"We have to go now." Angel, finally getting back stated as he took the weapons bag from her. "We're going through the sewers..."  
  
After meeting Holland, he just left...after looking over Lindsey that is. I wasn't sure what was going on, the man had just stood in front of me, smiling creepily. I wondered what Sairi was doing, and if Angel and his team was planning on saving Lindsey and I. I had a coughing fit, of mostly blood and chuckled...who am I kidding...if they save me...I'm still a dead woman.  
  
-Feel-  
  
Robbie Williams  
  
Come and hold my hand  
  
I wanna contact the living  
  
Not sure I understand  
  
This role I've been given  
  
I sit and talk to GodAnd he just laughs at my plans  
  
My head speaks a language  
  
I don't understand  
  
I just want to feel real love  
  
Feel the home that i live in  
  
'Cause I got too much life  
  
Running through my veins  
  
Going to waste  
  
I don't want to die  
  
But I ain't keen on living either  
  
Before i fall in love  
  
I'm preparing to leave her  
  
I scare myself to death  
  
That's why i keep on running  
  
Before I've arrived  
  
I can see myself coming  
  
I just want to feel real love  
  
Feel the home that i live in  
  
'Cause I got too much life  
  
Running through my veins  
  
Going to waste  
  
And I need to feel real love  
  
And a life ever after  
  
I cannot give it up  
  
I just want to feel feal love  
  
Feel the home that i live in  
  
I got too much love  
  
Running through my veins  
  
To go to waste  
  
I just wanna feel real love  
  
In a life ever after  
  
There's a hole in my soul  
  
You can see it in my face  
  
It's a real big place  
  
Come and hold my hand  
  
I want to contact the living  
  
Not sure I understandThis role I've been given  
  
Not sure I understand  
  
Not sure I understand  
  
Not sure I understand  
  
Not sure I understand   
  
AN: This chapter really didn't turn out as good as I wished for it to, it left to many questions in my opinion, like;  
  
Why is Lindsey in the same dark room with Amara?  
  
And,  
  
Why is Sairi being so, well...bitchy lately?   
  
These answers should be answered soon enough [I hope]  
  
Anyway,  
  
www.freewebs.com/bleeding_soul  
  
I have a new picture up under fan-art. Question is, who is it? See if you can guess. 


	6. Once Upon A December

Chapter Five: Once Upon A December   
  
AN- To the two of you that have reviewed, thanks! I really mean it, you two are the ones that are making me want to write more of this. I really, appreciate your reviews.   
  
I lost track of time, I could have been their for hours and I wouldn't have known it. After awhile, I just gave up on trying to break the chains and let my body slump against the wall. I was unbelievably tired, but...sleep in this kind of situation was just not an option. I managed to jump at every noise, and found my self watching Lindsey, willing him to wake up. I was so scared...and I didn't want to be alone...after awhile I started to hum, old tunes that I had played on the piano. The only thing I could do in my old life...play the piano, and now I brought my self to those times that I sat in the living room in front of my parents, playing the piano to receive their praise. Now, I just hummed the tunes so I wouldn't be alone with my thoughts...for thoughts can be more fearful then the situation...   
  
His head had been pounding, the only solace in the matter was the fact that there was only one steady noise and not the loud sounds of a fight he had been expecting when he would wake. He heard only humming...and that terrified him when he opened his eyes. The room he was in was dim, nearly completely dark. His hand went to his head to feel the dried blood above his left eye...well that was why his head was throbbing.   
  
"Amara?"   
  
The humming stopped, which was really to bad...it was something to concentrate on other then the pain. Finally his eyes adjusted to the light around him, he could see her hanging form.   
  
"Hey there sleepy head." She stated while arching a brow, and giving a slight sigh.   
  
"Do you know where we are?"   
  
"I was told we were at Wolfram and Hart..."   
  
"Must be in the basement then...the rest of the building really doesn't look like a..." Lindsey glanced around one last time. "A...dreary castle in England."   
  
"Actually, the castles in England for the most part aren't dreary...they are well kept...even the dungeons actually." Amara explained, causing an odd glance from Lindsey. "I was over there before I came to LA."   
  
He nodded and stood up with a slight sway to his body, the suit he wore was caked with dirt and sweat, Amara just looked at him as he moved towards her...he looked so different then what she was used to. He tugged at her chains and shook his head,   
  
"They won't come off anytime soon, I recognize them…same ones we have that we have to hold vampires, you won't be pulling them off the wall anytime soon." He explained to her, and she just rolled her eyes…talk about late information. That would have been helpful to know while she was nearly cutting off her hands trying to get out. Truth be told, she would have tried to get out anyway even if she knew they were to hold vampires. She didn't have that special strength that they had…she had, whatever the powers wanted her to have. It seemed right now, the powers were away on vacation seeing as they weren't getting her out of this situation. You'd think they would want her to get out…  
  
"What's going to happen to us?"   
  
Lindsey plopped himself down on the concrete floor next to her and sighed, "I don't know, you'll probably be kept in here as long as you try to fight them and this situation…if you don't fight and do whatever they want…well, you'll probably get better treatment…if you fight it will probably be more painful when they take the blood. If you don't, it will probably be just a needle being stuck into you."  
  
"W…what about you? What will they do to you?"  
  
He glanced up, meeting her eyes and arched a brow. "Didn't know you cared…" He stated sarcastically, a slight small smile on his lips.  
  
"Yeah, well…you saved me…I just want to make sure nothing happens to my savior before I get a chance to pay him back."  
  
Lindsey pulled his gaze away from her, now his vision was replaced with a cold, uncaring, dark floor instead of Amara. "Do you want to know the truth?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"They will probably kill me, this is the second time I betrayed them…the first time was to protect some little kids from being killed. I knew what they would do to you if they found you…I hid you…and then I left…no word, just left…without even finishing my cases, leaving all my clients to hang…and I went to Wolfram and Harts number one enemy…Angel. I'll probably be killed…"  
  
There was a sound of unlocking, followed by the sound of the heavy metal door being opened. This time instead of just one person visiting them, there were four. One, both Amara and Lindsey recognized…while the others just looked like hired suits.  
  
"Worse…we aren't letting you die…ever." Holland spoke, calmly with a grin as the three other men came into grab Lindsey who gave up as much fight as he could before he was shoved roughly against the wall next to Amara, in such an angle whereas he couldn't push the men away without breaking his neck.  
  
Neither of us apparently expected this, what they were doing was just…wrong. I, however didn't have a say in the matter. Holland was going to let Lindsey be his little test rabbit, he was going to make Lindsey drink my blood first. I had opened my mouth to object only to have Holland stand in front of me, still smiling while he put duck tape over my lips. Lindsey…god, he shouldn't have to be forced to drink…he shouldn't live the kind of life I do…its…not fair.  
  
Holland took off his dark colored suit jacket, and handed it to one of the suited men that wasn't doing anything. A small box was pulled out of his dress pants, it was a deep rich oak color with what Amara recognized as Runes carved into it. She arched a brow, and was ready to make a comment…but the tape had halted her from doing so. The box was opened to reveal a small knife, that looked like a normal pairing knife used for peeling apples in the kitchen or something.  
  
This knife boggled her, it was so small…but the blade gleamed in the dim light. It was sharp, apparently this was a man who didn't care about the size of the weapon, as long as it got the job done. Lindsey from her side had tried to push off the two men holding him down, but with a groan he was smacked back into the hard wall.   
  
"Stop fighting it, we are about to give you the best gift you will ever receive…immortality."  
  
"I don't want it…just kill me." Lindsey responded with gritted teeth, as he was able to turn his head slightly to see what Holland was doing.  
  
"Well, you are still a valid employee of this company…and we'd like to have you alive."  
  
"You'd like to have someone who will betray you at any moment become an immortal?"  
  
"Yes…but we will take certain precautions…spells, incantations…etcetera, to make sure you stay in place this time." Holland explained while ripping the tape off of Amara's mouth before he brought his knife up to her lips.   
  
"Don't do this…" She begged, but didn't get far before the knife was pushed to her lips.  
  
"Shush now, this should only take a few minutes…" With that he began cutting tiny slits in her lips, crimson rivers starting to roll down her chin, across her neck, and down the top of her shirt. Her eyes shut, as Holland made a 'Hmm' sound. "Seems the powers aren't healing you that quickly eh? Probably trying to kill you off before we get to your blood…not to worry…there should be enough blood in you to make most of us immortal…and then…we can make the others immortal." He explained while stepping back, giving the suited men a wave with his hand to pull Lindsey in front of Amara.  
  
"You fucking bastard…" Lindsey started, only to be cut off by the ever calm Holland.  
  
"I sensed some chemistry between you two while watching the tape feed…why don't you give the little immortal a kiss?" A brow was arched along with a chuckle as he watched the men push Lindsey's head to Amara's.   
  
Once his lips were over hers, one of the suited men pinched his nose. He had to open his mouth sometime, the chanting had already started from Holland. It was an actual simplistic chant, but extremely hard to find…they had to go to nearly every temple in China to get the scrolls that had all the chants. Now, everything seemed to be turning out as planned. A broad smile crossed his face as he continued the chant, watching as a glowing light started to swirl around Amara and Lindsey.  
  
He had opened his mouth, he had to…he had to breath, and the man holding him just pushed his face more against Amara's so that his open mouth covered her bloody lips. This was cruel, crueler then he had expected from Holland…  
  
Lindsey could feel the blood in his mouth, the taste barely registered as it swam down the back of his throat. Amara had opened her eyes and looked at him fearfully, neither one new what to expect and the glowing light was making the situation even more terrifying. They met their gaze, and both knew it was far to late. Lindsey started to kiss her blood covered mouth of his own free will and she kissed him back, the chanting had stopped…but the swirl of light continued around them. One of the suited men had let go of Lindsey, stumbling back a bit before the other man holding onto him was thrown off by some invisible force.  
  
"What's happening?!" Holland roared, as he brought his cell phone to his ear and started to bark orders into it. Things weren't going to plan, not at all.  
  
Holland had made him take blood from my lips to torture Lindsey even more, to taunt him almost…and when he had taken in so much blood…it's like, he gave up…like he knew this was either the end of his life…or the beginning of a very long one. He…actually started to kiss me, I was taken a back…and I kissed him back. It's hard to believe I was kissing the same geeky guy I used to know in my old life. It…felt right, I could feel my blood dripping into him…I felt a tugging, like he was taking something from me and I wondered what it was…until I finally figured it out. He was taking my immortality away, I wasn't sure if it was supposed to happen like that. The kiss grew more intense and so did the lights, then I realized, the spell…the chant…my immortality. It wasn't, that I could be a blood bar for so many people to become immortal…I gave my immortality to only one person…and then…I don't know what. I felt dizzy…maybe I die now…but, I didn't get to finish my destiny did I? I don't want to die again…  
  
The golden light illuminated the whole room, it stayed around the kissing duo. Lindsey had wrapped his arms around her and pulled away from the kiss, but the light around them didn't stop. It just kept going, and going. "I don't think this was supposed to happen."   
  
"Me either." Amara stated in a small whisper of a voice, "I don't feel very well…"  
  
"I won't let anything happen to you."  
  
"Promise?"  
  
"I promised that along time ago…to your father, he told me that he thought something might happen to him…"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Just listen…he told me, that if he died…I was to watch out for you and your sister…but you all died…so I didn't get a chance to…but now…you're alive…so I'll make sure…you stay that way."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because…it's the way it's supposed to be."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Prophecies work in strange ways…"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
He had confused her, it was like he had suddenly become the Dali lama or something. She felt her binds fall, her hands dropping to her sides.   
  
"Don't worry about it, I'll explain it all later…I think…I don't know how I know…but, this light…it just cut off your binds for a reason…we need to get to the sewers…"  
  
"But…"  
  
"I promised…you're safe."  
  
"Okay."  
  
The light started to spread out, blinding those in the room long enough for Lindsey to grab hold of Amara's hand and lead her out of the room, the light had stayed in the room…it was still swirling. Amara looked back and nearly tripped but was saved by Lindsey pulling her up in his arms. She gripped his neck and watched as the light started to turn into a deep red color, she grimaced. Why did people who didn't know any better have to mess with the magic's?   
  
"Back into the sewers!" She heard Lindsey call out, whipping her head around she seen Angels head duck back down. The light exploded from the room the moment she looked back, heading towards them…faster…faster…faster…  
  
and then their was nothing.  
  
Silence.  
  
Darkness.  
  
Memories.  
  
I remember the first dog I ever had, it was a Black Lab Amanda and I had called Zeek. I remember the first time I went to school, it was raining, Mom and Dad walked us to the bus stop and stayed their with us keeping us warm and dry under their umbrella. In second grade my Dad put me in front of the piano and I never stopped playing. The first day of High School I remember being the center of attention with Amanda because we were twins. I remember the first dance I went to, getting ready and walking down the stairs to be met with my Dad and Lindsey who were interrogating my date. I remember seeing all the blood in the kitchen…I remember meeting Sairi. I remember saving Lorne. I remember arguing with Angel. I remember researching with Wesley. I remember my first kiss with Lindsey…I remember…the bright light…  
  
-Once Upon A December-  
  
Deana Carter  
  
Dancing bears,  
  
Painted wings  
  
Things I almost remember  
  
And a song someone sings   
  
Once upon a December  
  
Someone holds me safe and warm  
  
Horses prance through a silver storm  
  
Figures dancing gracefully  
  
Across my memory...   
  
Someone holds me safe and warm   
  
Horses prance through a silver storm   
  
Figures dancing gracefully  
  
Across my memory...  
  
Far away, long ago  
  
Glowing dim as an ember,  
  
Things my heart used to know,  
  
Things it yearns to remember...  
  
And a song someone sings  
  
Once upon a December  
  
AN- Sorry for the shortness of this chapter, and the little cliffhanger ending. I just couldn't write anymore right now. I'm going on 48 hours of sleepless-ness and I require food-stuffs. Hopefully the next chapter will be better, though at this point I have no idea what the next chapter is going to be about. -sigh-  
  
Oh, also I got another reviewer! Wooooooo. I'm so happy. Thanks for reviewing you guys. 


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